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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/26137468">Hideaway</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sammy_is_obsessed/pseuds/Sammy_is_obsessed'>Sammy_is_obsessed</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Sanders Sides (Web Series)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Angst/Fluff, Because I love him but I also love to make him suffer, Can I tag this fast burn?, Creativity | Roman "Princey" Sanders Angst, Established moceit, He gets angst too!, Hurt/Comfort, I swear this isn't anti Janus, It's time to dive into that sweet sweet Roman angst, Jan's my favorite side I love the snake boy, Logince - Freeform, M/M, Romantic Logince - Freeform, and so he's not exactly thinking too highly of him, but Roman has some issues with him obviously, but let's not forget Logan!, don't worry y'all this is still going to have a ton of fluff, is it even my work if it doesn't include confessions of love?, that relatable moment when realizing you're in love is so intense that you need to sit down, the feelings are already jumping out but give it a minute, these idiots are about to delve into confessions don't you worry</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-08-27</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-04-07</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-18 03:53:26</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>General Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>8</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>17,989</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/26137468</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sammy_is_obsessed/pseuds/Sammy_is_obsessed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>After the Wedding and the discussion that follows, Roman and Logan have reached a breaking point. In confiding in one another, Roman has an epiphany: What if they went away for a while?</p><p>But how long will "a while" really be? What fate does The Imagination hold for them? And what will the others think when they turn up missing?</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Anxiety | Virgil Sanders/Dark Creativity | Remus "The Duke" Sanders, Creativity | Roman "Princey" Sanders/Logic | Logan Sanders, Deceit | Janus Sanders/Morality | Patton Sanders</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>128</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>141</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. Chapter 1</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Roman paces the floor of his room, hands threaded in his frazzled hair. It doesn’t make any sense! Thomas had taken Jan-<em>Deceit’s</em> side, disregarding any of his hesitations. He didn’t think he was the bad guy anymore. And Roman… for so long, he was<em> sure</em> that he was Thomas’s hero. But now? What can he believe anymore?</p><p>Roman stiffens when he hears a knock on his door, the pit in his stomach expanding when he realizes tears have begun to slip down his cheeks.</p><p>“I’m – uh, I’m busy!” Roman says, cursing the way his voice cracks. If they're wise, whoever’s on the other side of the door will leave well enough alone. But then, a voice pipes up.</p><p>“Roman… may I come in?”<em> Logan</em>.</p><p>Right now, Roman would be prepared to send anyone else away without much of a second thought. But Logan isn’t anyone else, and there’s a raw, strangely quiet quality to his voice that can’t help but make his heart pang.</p><p>“I– maybe it would be best, if you came back later,” Roman says, furiously wiping the tears from his eyes.</p><p>“<em>Please</em>,” Logan says, so gentle it’s nearly a whisper, “Please let me in.”</p><p>Roman couldn’t place it a moment ago, but now he’s identified the strangeness in Logan’s: it’s fear. And while Roman’s body is wracked with shivers, and the tears are slipping down his cheeks despite his will to just stop being so<em> fucking </em>sensitive, he opens the door.</p><p>“Listen, Logan now’s not really…” Roman trails off, seeing the broken look in Logan’s eyes. “Oh,” he says because it’s the only word that comes to mind, despite all the other things he wants to express. He steps aside, allowing Logan to walk into the room and shut the door behind him.</p><p>“You’re crying,” Logan notes, and there’s a fearful tremor in his voice.</p><p>Roman’s gaze flickers to the wall, his hand once again whipping at his eyes, wishing he could stop, praying he’ll be able to turn everything off, for just a moment, and <em>breathe</em>. Such desires are nothing but a fairytale, though, and they have been since the wedding and the horrible conversation that followed.</p><p>“No, really?” Roman asks, sarcasm thick and bitter.</p><p>He doesn’t want to act this way; he wants to comfort Logan through whatever it is he’s clearly dealing with. He wants to put on a brave face, the way Patton used to do (But that isn’t healthy. Does it matter?) He wants to prove to Thomas that he’s made the wrong decision, that Deceit isn’t to be trusted, and that Roman can still be his hero. That he still <em>deserves </em>their love.</p><p>But all he can manage is resentment.  </p><p>“I’m sorry,” Roman mumbles, his eyes still cast away from Logan’s prying gaze, “I– I don’t. I’m not trying to be… What was it that you needed?” Roman doesn’t mean to trail off and lose all semblance of what he was trying to say, not that he’s sure what that exactly was, but it happens nonetheless, and it seems he’s made a friend in deflection and distraction.</p><p>“I came to speak with you,” Logan says, his voice searching, begging to be let in, but Roman won’t let him, not like this, “After everything that’s happened… the wedding, and… and Janus.” Logan seems to struggle slightly through the name, but the Virgil-Esque growl that Roman delivers in response is telling of his feelings on the matter.</p><p>“Deceit mascaraed as you!” Roman shouts, his hands held in the air, “<em>Again</em>! And Thomas sided with him! For the love of Disney;<em> Patton </em>sided with him! Patton thinks, he thinks…”</p><p>Roman can’t even bear to face what it is that Patton thinks. That Deceit is worthy of a second chance? That he deserves a seat at the table? It was too upsetting to think about, not without getting worked up to a point of no return. And Roman is already dangerously close to that.  </p><p>“He did,” Logan agrees, distaste palpable, “He assumed my identity, once again, and… you all were none the wiser.” The words hang heavy in the air, tension electrified and unsteady.</p><p>“Well, he’s– he’s a master manipulator! Cut us a little slack here, Teach! We didn’t– if we’d known, we would’ve done something! <em>I </em>would’ve done something, I- I swear. I just…” Roman collapses onto his ornate bed, his head in his hands. “I’m sorry. I wasn’t able to protect you, o-or Patton, or even Thomas from him. I <em>tried</em>, but… I wasn’t strong enough.” Roman sniffles, fresh tears clouding his vision. “Maybe you should leave.”</p><p>“Roman,” Logan says hesitantly, his voice so much gentler than usual. Roman shivers as he feels a dip in the mattress and a hand settle onto the small of his back, the action stiff but still expressing the intent of comfort. “It isn’t your job to ‘protect’ us from Janus, or anyone else, for that matter. I came here because… I was concerned, after what transpired. I was informed that you sunk out after a rather terse point in the conversation, and I thought it best to check in.”</p><p>“I’m <em>fine</em>,” Roman says, despite the fact that his hands are still covering his face and he’s begun to tremble under Logan’s touch, “It’s just… a lot to process. But I’m alright. You don’t– you don’t need to be here.”</p><p>“Falsehood,” Logan says, and Roman can’t bear to hear him say that, “Roman… I know you wanted that callback a tremendous amount.”<br/><br/>“Y-you don’t –.”</p><p>“I do,” Logan says sadly, “I’m not trying to make things more difficult for you, please, understand that is by no means my intention. But you’re going through a lot, emotionally. Feelings are by no means my area of expertise but…” Logan trails off, nearly losing his nerve before he pushes forward, rubbing slow circles into Roman’s back, “… I’m <em>here</em>. I’m here to talk about whatever it is you need to talk about, or to–.”</p><p>Logan gasps as Roman turns around and pitches himself forward, pushing them both down into the mattress as he winds his arms around the logical side, his face buried in Logan’s shoulder. Logan struggles for a moment, with Roman lying on top of him and soaking his polo with tears, but quickly he readjusts and resumes rubbing circles into the princely side’s back.</p><p>He doesn’t quite know what he’s doing. Emotions are a tricky thing, especially these intense, soberingly sad ones, but Logan is fairly sure he’s behaving as he should. He’s whispering words of comfort and reassurance (words he can’t be sure are true or not), and holding him close, and allowing Roman to ‘cry it out.’ He’s heard emotional release is very important, and by the looks of things, Roman’s been in dire need of it for some time.</p><p>He tries not to think about the fact that Janus yanked him from the discussion by his crook, or that his low-downs had been ignored, or that a great deal of his advice has been pushed to the wayside for some time now, or –</p><p>“Logan?” Roman sniffles, interrupting Logan’s frantic thoughts and oh, he must’ve stopped rubbing Roman’s back, his hand having gone uncomfortably still.</p><p>“My apologies,” Logan mutters, “I suppose I was, uh, figuratively lost in thought for a moment there.”</p><p>“What is it?” Roman asks, pushing himself into a seated position. There are still tear-tracks on his face, and his skin is rather flushed, but suddenly, all of his attention has been directed to Logan. And Logan doesn’t know if he likes it.</p><p>“I beg your pardon?”</p><p>“You’re upset,” Roman says, “What’s the matter?”</p><p>“We’re focusing on you right now,” Logan urges, “We’re talking about how you’re feeling at the moment, Roman.”</p><p>“Well, I want to know how you’re feeling.”</p><p>Roman fails to mention the fact that he’s mind-numbingly embarrassed for having sobbed into Logan’s shirt for so long and breaking down to a point where it feels as though the same fate is imminent to repeat. He’s failed so severely, made so many wrong choices. It feels like everyone’s flipped the script on him. At the trial, Roman was chastised for so much as <em>considering</em> Deceit’s point of view, but now? Now it seems he’s the villain for not seeing eye to eye with the snake. He’s always tried to do everything he can, to live up to the expectations he’s woven for himself, and what he believes the others assume he’s capable of… but he’s<em> failed</em>. How is it that the hero can take such a fall from grace?</p><p>Was he ever a hero at all?</p><p>“Roman…”</p><p>“Please, Logan,” Roman says, just edging on begging, “Indulge me. What’s going on in that brain of yours?”</p><p>Logan gives Roman a quizzical look, studying him for cracks in his slipping composure, before letting out a sigh.</p><p>“Believe it or not,” Logan begins, crossing his arms over his chest, “The decision to go to the wedding, and the events that have followed have been… less than ideal for me.” Roman tilts his head.</p><p>“But I thought you were impartial to either decision? At the trial–.”</p><p>“The callback was a rare opportunity,” Logan says simply, hoping, foolishly, that Roman won’t prod any further, “One that is unlikely to reappear. In terms of Thomas’s career…” Logan trails off, seeing the look of hurt flash in Roman’s eyes.</p><p>“Don’t remind me.”</p><p>“Additionally,” Logan says, fiddling with his tie, “I’ve found that lately, my advice has been… discarded, to some extent. It’s been made explicitly clear that my company is not always desired, and it seems, I’m having a little trouble accepting that.” Logan stiffens when he catches sight of the look in Roman’s eyes and, oh dear, it appears Roman’s portraying a great deal of emotions that Logan has no idea how to deal with.</p><p>“Logan…”</p><p>“I’m not trying to upset you,” Logan says, “I’m merely explaining what you asked of me.”</p><p>“We want you around,” Roman says, his hand reaching out to touch Logan’s, “<em>I </em>want you around. I know we have our disagreements– quite a bit of disagreement, really. But I want you, Logan, and, for the record… I’m sorry.” A shiver runs down his back as Roman laces their fingers together, the touch overwhelmingly tender.</p><p>“What are you apologizing for?”</p><p>“For making you feel unwanted,” Roman says, “I’ve gotten so lost in what I want for Thomas, and what Patton says is morally right. And now– well, now everything’s so much. But I <em>am</em> sorry.” Logan wasn’t expecting an apology or the warm sensation of Roman’s hand in his, but both things provoke feelings in him that he cannot comprehend.</p><p>“I’m sure the others will be wondering where we are soon,” Logan notes, pulling his hand away. Roman frowns. But then, his expression changes and Logan doesn’t quite trust that look in his eyes.</p><p>“What if… what if we went somewhere for a while?”</p><p>“What’re you talking about?”</p><p>“You and me,” Roman says, standing up, his face lighting up with a look of hope Logan can’t account for, “What if we went away? Took a break from all chaos and expectations,” the last word comes out just a whisper, sorrow tinting it.</p><p>“I don’t understand what you’re talking about,” Logan says, still trying to make sense of Roman’s sudden energetic outburst, “Where would we go? Where could we go? Furthermore, <em>how</em> could we go? I don’t think I need to be the one to remind you that we have a job to do, Roman. We cannot leave our posts, regardless of personal issues.”</p><p>“The Imagination,” Roman says, as if the explanation clears much up for the logical side, “I have somewhere we can go. Just for a little bit! We wouldn’t be gone for more than a day if that! Just a little time to take the edge off, to <em>breathe</em>. Aren’t you tired, Logan? Aren’t you exhausted?”</p><p>“I–,” Logan pauses, shudder under the intensity of Roman’s gaze, “I’m not sure about this.”</p><p>“Oh, come <em>on</em>, nerd,” Roman says, grabbing hold of Logan’s arm and pulling him to his feet, “Come with me. I promise, whatever you want to talk about, I’ll listen. You can catalog the flora and fauna of The Imagination! Oh, I’ll show you everything! You’re going to love it! Please, come with me. Take a break. I... I don’t want to be alone.”</p><p>Roman doesn’t bring himself to say, “<em>can’t </em>be alone,” but Logan picks it up regardless. Roman is at the end of his tether in so many ways; it would be wrong to leave him on his own now. Dangerous, even. And despite the building hesitations, the idea of some time for themselves, if only for a little while, is more appealing than it ought to be.</p><p>“Just for a little while?” Logan asks carefully. Roman nods up and down quickly.</p><p>“I promise! A-are you coming?” The desperation that takes hold of Roman’s voice is devastating. Logan doesn’t know how he could tell him no, at least not now. Logan nods.</p><p>“I am. I’ll come.” Logan stiffens as Roman throws his arms around him, once again pulling him into a suffocating tight embrace, though Logan isn’t sure he’s entirely opposed to such a thing.</p><p>“Then let’s not waste any more time,” Roma says, taking Logan’s hand, “Let’s go.”</p><p>A more rational, composed part of Logan is screaming at him that this is a <em>terrible</em> idea that can only end poorly. Roman’s in an incredibly fraught mental state (Logan’s not sure if he’s fairing much better) and leaving the problem isn’t going to magically fix it. Logan should have a better sense than to agree to something like this but… he doesn’t. Not when he’s been so tired for so long, not when Roman’s offering him salvation, not when all he wants is a little peace.</p><p>And so, Logan allows Roman to lead him through a door and into The Imagination, foolish curiosity outweighing reason.</p><p>=+=</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. Chapter 2</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>“When you said you had someplace in mind… this wasn’t exactly what I was expecting.”</p><p>“What do you mean? This is perfect!” Logan glances around the entrance of the castle, his eyes grazing over the lavish and detailed building. Logan had thought perhaps Roman had meant a cottage or a somewhat sizable home, but this? This is a lot, to say the least.</p><p>“I’m not so sure about this.”</p><p>Roman turns to Logan, a look of hurt flashing in his eyes.</p><p>“What are you saying? You want to turn back?” Logan can’t stand the strain in Roman’s voice.</p><p>“That isn’t what I’m suggesting this is all just… a bit much.”</p><p>'A bit much' barely begins to cover the extravagance of the castle. Logan’s never ventured this far into The Imagination before. He’s only been in it a few times, brought by Roman who’s shown him a handful of his creations and the sites he’s conjured up. He’s been shown some of the creatures Roman’s prouder of – unicorns, dragons, <em>unicorn-dragons</em>, etc. – but nothing like this.</p><p>Logan can’t even begin to ponder how long it took for Roman to construct such a structure. Even from the exterior, he can see that Roman has spared no expense in the detail department. Ivy climbs high along the castle walls, not overgrown, but coexisting, as though the structure has been here for years and years. The castle sits on a hill, large and grand, and Logan’s almost surprised there isn’t a crocodile-infested mote, too. It would certainly fit the aesthetic.</p><p>“<em>Please</em>, Logan. Won’t you give it a chance?” Despite his hesitation, Logan doesn’t know how he’d be able to say no to Roman when his voice is so wounded and fragile. He sounds so close to a breaking point, something which Logan fears to consider the very possible reality of.</p><p>“Alright, Roman,” he sighs, “Alright.”</p><p>The look of relief that crosses over Roman’s face is a final piece of proof that Logan doesn’t have it in him to fight it. He’ll do what his friend asks, he’ll allow Roman to lead him in almost any direction, so long as it seems like it’s for the best.</p><p>Logan wonders when he allowed himself to be so ruled by the emotions he’s so insistent on not having.</p><p>“Splendid!” Roman says, smiling bright, though the expression is far more forced than he’s letting on, “I promise you won’t regret this.” Logan stiffens as Roman takes his hand in his and leads him into the castle.</p><p>Physical contact has always been something Logan isn’t too sure about his opinion of. Patton’s always been a rather affectionate person, making it impossible to avoid bear-hugs from time to time. He supposes he doesn’t mind that too much, and every once in a while, he’ll receive an embrace from another side, though it’s rare. But Roman grabbing hold of his hand feels… different. Different in a way that Logan can’t quite place. He dares to think he might even like it.</p><p>=+=</p><p>Logan finds himself wandering the palace alone not long after he and Roman have entered. It’s not as though he’s actively avoiding Roman’s presence; quite the contrary, he can’t find him anywhere. Early on, Logan was so lost in the detail and sprawling size of the castle that he hadn’t realized Roman was no longer beside him.</p><p>He can’t be sure how long he’s been wandering these halls. Time seems to pass far different in The Imagination, and Logan’s never been here long enough to have gotten a handle on the mechanics of it in the past, but he’s almost positive he’s seen the sunrise and set at least two times now.</p><p>Every room is as immaculate and well-crafted as the last. He’s walked through a ballroom, glorious and beautiful, a library rivaling that of Beauty and the Beast, a thrown room, and many other places that have already managed to slip from his mind. How long has Roman spent on this place, he wonders? And more pointedly, how much time does he occupy this castle? He’s seen no one save for Roman when they entered, and he’s positive the creative side can conjure staff and townsfolk on a whim.</p><p>Logan despises giving into such silly bouts of emotion… but he’s feeling rather lonely. It doesn’t make much sense, really; Logan is perfectly capable of being alone. He often spends countless hours holed up in his room, doing research, mapping out schedules that will inevitably be ignored, doing things he deems important for Thomas. Doing things that will make him <em>feel </em>important.</p><p>But here he finds himself, in an unfamiliar place, ever-expansive and too damn quiet. He’d assumed Roman would keep him company, that Roman <em>needed </em>his company, and without it might fall to a million pieces. But maybe not… Why, then, would he even invite Logan to come? What purpose was he possibly serving here?</p><p>“Logan! There you are!”</p><p>Logan jerks around, surprised to hear Roman’s voice cut through the hours – had it been hours? Days? Logan can’t be sure – of unbearable silence.</p><p>“Oh, Roman,” he says, praying his voice doesn’t betray how relieved he feels, “I was wondering where you’d gone.”</p><p>“I could say the same about you, pocket protector. You disappeared on me.” Huh. Had they both simply gone off in opposite directions? Logan supposes it’s possible.  </p><p>“I’m fairly sure I’ve seen the sunrise and set several times in the time we’ve been apart,” Logan notes, still a little overcome with the sudden shock of no longer being alone, “How can you explain that?”</p><p>“Oh, time’s pretty weird here,” Roman says, rubbing the back of his neck sheepishly. Roman's behaving abashed and uncomfortable and it’s so <em>wrong</em>. Logan isn’t an idiot; he knows much of his boisterous confidence is little more than an act. But it’s an act he’s usually so much better at playing. “It’s kind of random,” Roman explains, waving his hand dismissively, “You know, magic and all that.”</p><p>“But you have complete creative control here, do you not? At least in your sector of The Imagination? Furthermore, I’m surprised you’d chalk your accomplishments up to mere ‘magic’.” Evidently, that was a poor choice of words. Roman’s ill-conceived smile falters and the look that his face twists into is gut-wrenching. “I-I’m not saying this to upset you. It’s just –.”</p><p>“It’s fine,” Roman assures, though Logan’s fairly certain Janus would be calling out the lie if they were in the mind palace, “I’m alright. Of course, I’m alright. It’s just… one of those kinks I’ve never been able to quite work out.”</p><p>“Time existing so fluidly?”</p><p>“Yes. To my knowledge, Remus hasn’t figured it out at all either. Not that I feel too inclined to ask. Sometimes, days pass in the blink of an eye. Others, drag on and on. It can feel like a century can pass in here, or no time at all. Sometimes, I’ve got a little bit of a handle on it, but for the most part, it’s very odd.”</p><p>“Oh,” Logan says, hearing the disappointment in Roman’s tone, and, oh dear, Roman thinks he’s <em>disappointed </em>in him, “Well that’s… that’s rather fascinating.”</p><p>“Y-yeah?”</p><p>“Yes,” Logan says, “I think that would be a very meaningful thing to observe.” Then, a thought occurs to him. “You promise we won’t spend too long in here though, right?” Roman blinks.</p><p>“Huh?”</p><p>“That we won’t stay away from the others, and from Thomas,” Logan clarifies, “We do have a job to return to. We can’t stay long.” Roman shakes his head.</p><p>“Right, yes, of course,” he says quickly, a little too quickly, “I’ve never stayed in here too long. We’ll just spend a little while. Oh, goodness, I haven’t even gotten to show you so much of the castle since we got separated. C’mon,” Roman says, grabbing Logan’s hand once more and lacing their fingers together. The logical side is all but hopeless to follow, allowing Roman to lead the way. After all, there’s very little chance of him being alone again this way.</p><p>Roman shows him every room of the castle as well as the courtyard, explaining in great detail every detail. Logan has to admit that he’s fascinated, and Roman’s willing to answer any of his numerous questions about this place and this realm as a whole.</p><p>He talks excitedly about his creations, that familiar spark lighting up in him. He hasn’t heard Roman sounds so proud in, well… he can’t remember how long it’s been. Even when he doesn’t quite know what he’s talking about, Logan listens intently, pleased to just be hearing Roman talk so happily.</p><p>He hadn’t been sure before, but now Logan feels certain this was a good idea after all. Roman seems to be doing better, and Logan’s feeling entirely wanted for the first time in a long time. There are no pressures here, no one to make him feel as though he needs to do everything in his power to prove he deserves to be listened to. Roman’s listening to him when he chimes in, and he’s content to hear out whatever his friend wants to talk about.</p><p>Logan is so engrossed in their conversation that he hardly notices that darkness has blanketed the sky for some time. It’s only when Roman suggests that they get some shut-eye that he realizes how long – or rather, that it’s been quite a while, as determining the exact time isn’t exactly possible – they’ve been talking. Of course, it’s a good idea to get some sleep. Logan is always eager to stress the importance of a healthy sleep schedule.</p><p>Except… Logan finds little solace in the feelings of a cushy bed in a pleasant room. It’s still dark outside the window, and he <em>should</em> be tired. He shouldn’t feel some odd, primal desire to climb out of bed and walk into the room Roman inhabits. It’s stupid; they were just talking for hours and hours. He’ll see Roman when he wakes up. There’s no reason to feel this way, so childish and needy.</p><p>Despite everything, he does. Logan can’t stop thinking about the feeling of Roman’s hand in his, or the sight of his true, dazzling smile. He can’t cast out the thought of finally,<em> finally</em> feeling wanted by someone.</p><p>And, in turn, he can’t stop himself from wanting.</p><p>=+=</p><p> </p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>We're really beginning to see the sweet, sweet yearning. I'd love to hear what you thought of this chapter and, as always, have a wonderful day/night!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. Chapter 3</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>The night is still, and cool, and <em>unbearable</em>. Logan doesn’t know why – doesn’t know if <em>Roman</em> knows why – but it feels like this night has lasted a millennium, yet he cannot find slumber. Not when his mind races with so much excitement, and anxiety, and want.</p><p>Logan wants so much. He’s never felt so greedy in all his life.</p><p>He should be satisfied with what Roman’s provided him. A large, comfortable room in a castle secluded and all their own. He’s offered Logan leisure and relaxation, something he’s been sorely lacking for how long, he cannot possibly say. All he is meant to do now is shut his eyes and fall asleep. But he can’t manage it.</p><p>Because every time his eyelids fall shut, he sees Roman, illuminating, enchanting, devastatingly sad, Roman. There is no solace in the darkness, there is no safety from these brimming, strong, unexplainable feelings, not even in his mind.</p><p>Logan’s never felt such an intense pull toward anything or anyone, but now it feels like he needs to be near to Roman as much as oxygen is necessary for life. It’s completely and utterly irrational; Roman is simply in another room. They inhabit the same building, for god’s sake, they’ll see each other in the morning, or whatever equivalent The Imagination will have for a morning. There’s no reason to be acting so childishly, this isn’t like Logan at all.</p><p>And yet, here he finds himself, tossing and turning, stepped in desire.</p><p>A desire for what, he can’t entirely say with confidence. A desire to be known, so deeply and intensely? A dire to be listened to, to be understood for everything that he is? A desire to be held tightly, and never let go? All of the above seems to sum it up best and Logan <em>hates</em> it.</p><p>He can’t recall when these wants began to creep into his mind, but now that he’s aware of their intrusive presence, he cannot find peace. Logan came here with the hopes that he and Roman would find rest and relaxation, allowing them to return to their duty’s calmer and more stable than they’d left them. Just a little time to decompress, he didn’t think it was asking for too much, at least he hoped not. But now Logan doesn’t know if this is anything close to relaxation, this weight that sits heavy on his chest.</p><p>He’s turned loose from his troubled thoughts when the door creaks open slowly and Roman steps into the room, a hesitant look on his face.</p><p>“Roman?”</p><p>“I… I’m sorry, have I woken you?”</p><p>Logan shakes his head, reaching over to the nightstand and slipping his glasses on.</p><p>“Not at all. I haven’t been able to sleep,” Logan assures, assessing the expression that Roman wears. “Is something the matter?”</p><p>“No, nothing,” Roman says, out of impulse more than anything, Logan suspects, before he takes a step further into the room and rubs the back of his neck, “Well… that isn’t entirely true. I suppose I haven’t been able to sleep either.”</p><p>Logan hates the way he can hear Roman desperately fighting to keep it together. He’s thrashing, treading water, doing everything possible to keep from going under, but it may not prove to be enough. Logan’s never been in tune with his emotions, or the feelings of others, for that matter, but that doesn’t stop him from seeing how tortured Roman has been for so long. <em>Years</em>, maybe.</p><p>He’s reaching out. That is something of a rarity, of great importance, and Logan wishes he had a better idea of what to do next. If he isn’t careful, if he doesn’t choose the right wording, he could push him even further; he could be alone in this damned room again.</p><p>“Well, if we both can’t sleep,” Logan begins, his wording deliberate and cautious, “I don’t see why we can’t keep each other company.” The look of relief that spreads across his face is positively illuminating.</p><p>“Y-yeah? I’m… I’m not bothering you? Because, if so, I could always go back–.”</p><p>“You aren’t bothering me, Roman,” Logan interrupts, patting the spot on the bed beside him, “Truth be told, I wouldn’t mind the company.”</p><p>With that, Roman smiles faintly and sits beside Logan, though the space between them is a far greater expanse than Logan would care for.</p><p>The silence that settles over them is thick and uncomfortable. Logan notices as Roman traces over the crown patterns on his red silk pajama pants – the pair he’d provided Logan has constellations on them, with far more detail put into them than necessary, but the gesture was nice.</p><p>“It’s funny,” Roman says suddenly after a while, breaching the silence, “How lonely one can feel, even when there’s someone in the next room over.” His eyes remain trained on his lap, and Logan doesn’t know how he’d get the princely side to make eye contact, even though he desperately wants to.</p><p>“Is that how you’ve been feeling? Lonely?”</p><p>Roman bites his lip.</p><p>“Maybe,” he says, which, of course, means yes, “Things have been so… off lately. Haven’t they?” Logan doesn’t get a chance to respond before Roman’s speaking again. “Remember, when everything just felt <em>right</em>? We were all just friends, and helping Thomas, and important–.”</p><p>“You<em> are</em> important, Roman,” Logan cuts in, and that is what gets Roman’s attention. Roman meets his eyes, with a look that’s so shaken, so unbelieving, and frightened it’s like he’s looking into the eyes of some terrified animal. “You’re Thomas’s creativity. His hopes, his aspirations, and dreams. I cannot possibly fathom what an existence without you would be like. You’re so important and you always have been.” The very notion that Roman could be otherwise is utterly mindboggling.</p><p>Logan doesn’t know how he expects Roman to react, but it certainly isn’t with a scoff. Regardless, that’s just what he does.</p><p>“Yeah, right.”</p><p>“<em>You are</em>,” Logan repeats, “Roman, I understand that you’re going through… a lot right now.”</p><p>“And you aren’t?” Logan blinks.</p><p>“I beg your pardon?”</p><p>“Logan… do you ever get so lonely… so terribly forsaken, that it feels like you can’t <em>breathe</em>? Do you ever feel so unwanted, that you want to shut yourself in your room and never, ever come out? Do you ever feel so hopeless?” Roman’s voice quivers, and he squeezes his eyes shut. “No, I suppose not. It was a stupid thing to ask, really.”</p><p>“I do.” Roman’s eyes fly open again, meeting Logan’s tentative gaze.</p><p>“Huh?”</p><p>“I do, feel the way you’ve just described, sometimes,” Logan admits, his voice so quiet, so reserved that it’s barely over a whisper.</p><p>“Do you… do you feel that way often?” Logan lets out a long sigh.</p><p>“As of late, yes.” Logan can hardly comprehend the magnitude of what he’s admitting to. It seems that Roman can, though.</p><p>“Have you ever told anyone that?”</p><p>“I suppose not. You’re the first to know.”</p><p>“Lo… can I tell you a secret?” Logan can feel Roman edging just a little closer to him on the bed.</p><p>“Of course. You know you can tell me anything.”</p><p>Logan says it, but he doesn’t know, not really. He isn’t sure if he’s ever made Roman aware that he can trust him in such a way, and it’s a horrible realization to come to. Their friendship hasn’t always been the strongest, and arguments are certainly not an uncommon occurrence, but Logan trusts Roman, maybe more than he ought to. And he prays that Roman trusts him back just the same.</p><p>“That’s why I came in your room,” Roman says quietly, his voice steeped in shame, “I was lying there in bed, tossing and turning, feeling so stupidly lonely that I just… I had to come and see you. I didn’t even think that you might be fast asleep, or wouldn’t want the intrusion, or–.”</p><p>“But I wasn’t asleep, and you aren’t intruding on anything,” Logan reminds gently. Roman takes a shaky breath.</p><p>“R-right. But you <em>could’ve</em> been.”</p><p>“But I wasn’t.”</p><p>“I don’t know why, but I needed to. I… I <em>missed</em> you. God, I must sound so ridiculous.”</p><p>“You don’t.”</p><p>“I… don’t?” Roman’s voice brims with hesitance, his breath hitching as Logan settles a careful hand on his back.</p><p>“No. In fact, you’re making a great deal of sense. I know… I know I haven’t always been the best, dealing with issues of emotion.”</p><p>“Yeah, you’ve practically been calling yourself a robot for years.”</p><p>Logan sighs.</p><p>“Be that as it may, it has come to my attention that I… miscalculated, the scope of my feelings. They are still very much the bane of my existence. But…”</p><p>“But?”</p><p>“But they <em>do </em>exist,” Logan exhales, “And I need to face the fact that loneliness is one of them. So, yes, I can relate to what you’ve said. Perhaps a great deal more than I would like.”</p><p>Logan thinks that perhaps if the situation weren’t so strife, Roman would be teasing him now, for finally admitting that he isn’t an automaton. He might laugh, expressing his shock that Logan would dare say such a thing, and the laughter wouldn’t be cruel, not really, but it would certainly feel that way.</p><p>Roman sits there silently for a long while, staring at Logan with a look on his face the logical side can’t seem to read. And then, he speaks.</p><p>“Pocket protector, Logan, can– can I give you a hug?”</p><p>The question is jarring, and nothing that Logan is expecting, and truth be told, it’s incredibly overwhelming. But putting all that aside, Logan nods. It’s all he can manage, all possible verbal responses having left his mind.</p><p>Cautiously, Roman extends his arms and wraps them around Logan, lose at first, in case he wants to pull away. Logan doesn’t pull away, though. He lets out a gasp as he feels Roman’s arms around him, stilling for a moment before returning the embrace tightly.</p><p>“Is this okay?” Roman’s being so tentative, so gentle, it’s suddenly almost enough to bring Logan to tears.</p><p>“Yes,” he breaths out, “This is fine.”</p><p>It isn’t “fine.” It’s perfect, it’s something he’s been aching for, for eons. He can’t recall the last time he was hugged, the last time he <em>allowed </em>himself to be hugged, but now that he’s here in Roman’s embrace he never wants to leave its safety.</p><p>“Hey, it’s alright. You’re alright.” For a moment, Logan doesn’t understand why Roman is saying such things before he realizes that he’s begun to tremble.</p><p>“I– I…” Logan doesn’t quite know what he’s intending to convey, the words crumbling like sand in his mouth. Roman runs a hand along the back of his head, combing gently through his hair.</p><p>“It’s okay, Lo. Everything’s okay. Do you want me to keep holding you?” Logan, despite his best effort, can’t find it in himself to pull away.</p><p>“Yes,” he whispers, knowing he must sound pathetic.</p><p>He doesn’t know what happened; just a moment ago, he was comforting Roman, and now he’s being cradled like a frightened child, shushed and cooed at. How can something as simple as human touch render him so weak? Logan remembers, not long ago, when he would've shunned such outlandish displays of affection. But now? Now, he’s helpless.</p><p>“You’re so good, Lo. So smart, and sharp-witted, and <em>important</em>. I… I don’t believe I’ve told you that enough, how important you are to all of us. How important you are to me.” Logan feels a shudder run down his spine. It would be a lie to say Logan hadn’t imagined Roman saying such things, but to actually hear him say it is a different thing altogether. “Where would we be without our dear logic, hm?”</p><p>“Roman…” Logan trails off, still clinging tightly to the princely side, “Thank you.”</p><p>“Of course."</p><p>Logan is hardly aware of it when Roman pulls away for a moment, tucking them into the covers before folding him back into the embrace. Moments ago, Logan felt nothing but restless, but now exhaustion washes over him in waves.</p><p>Logan’s almost positive Roman doesn’t believe what he’s told him, that he’s of so much value and that Thomas would be lost without him. And yet, he continues to murmur words of encouragement to Logan. Logan doesn’t understand it; sure, he’s felt a little less than wanted lately, but he’s fine. He’s totally and completely… oh, who is he kidding?</p><p>“Logan, love, are you alright?” Logan’s exhaustion weighs so heavy that he barely notices the term of endearment that he’s used. He’s far more aware of the security he feels in his arms, of the warmth of Roman’s neck where his face is buried, and the feeling of sleep beginning to call to him.</p><p>“I’m fine,” Logan says, “Tired, but alright. What about you? Are you okay?”</p><p>“Yeah, I’m okay.”</p><p>They’re both lying, but Logan doesn’t have the energy to face such troubling thoughts. Not tonight, anyhow.</p><p>“Roman…” Logan mutters voice muddled with sleep.<br/><br/>“Go to sleep, Logan. We’ll talk in the morning.”</p><p>Despite his better judgment, Logan simply nods against him and shuts his eyes. He doesn’t know how long this night will last, but at the moment, it doesn’t concern him. Not when he’s in the arms of someone he loves so dearly. He’s craved this, for far longer than he’d like to admit. He’s ached for Roman’s embrace, and now he has it.</p><p>Roman says they’ll talk in the morning, but will they talk about this? About the insecurities they both face? About the feelings bubbling just below the surface. He highly doubts it.</p><p>Still, Logan sinks into Roman’s arms, sighing as he feels the feather-light pressure of a kiss being pressed into his hair.</p><p>“Goodnight,” Roman whispers, but Logan’s already asleep, unable to reply.</p><p>At least they won’t be lonely anymore. Not for tonight.</p><p>=+=</p><p>“Where the fuck are they?!”</p><p>Patton rounds the corner, having heard Virgil shout.</p><p>“Virgil, kiddo, what’s the matter? What’re you looking for?”</p><p>“Logan and Roman! I haven’t seen them anywhere! Patton, I– I can’t find them.” A look of concern falls over the fatherly figments face as he scans over a very nervous-looking Virgil.</p><p>“I’m sure I just saw Logan a few moments ago.” Virgil doesn’t look like he believes him.</p><p>“Are you positive?”</p><p>“Well…”</p><p>“You aren’t, right?”</p><p>Patton sighs.</p><p>“No, I guess not.”</p><p>“I’m seriously worried here, Pat. They’ve both seemed so down and now… now I can’t find them anywhere? What if something happened to them? What if they’re lost, o-or left, or –.”<br/><br/>“Hey,” Patton cuts in, placing a gentle hand on the anxious side’s shoulder, “It’s going to be okay. We’ll find them, alright?” Virgil worries his bottom lip.</p><p>“Yeah, yeah o-okay.”</p><p>“They can’t have gotten too far off,” Patton assures, slipping a hand into Virgil’s and giving a reassuring squeeze, “I’m sure we’ll find them in no time.”</p><p>It’s a shame, how wrong Patton’s optimistic outlook proves to be.</p><p>=+=</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Sorry, this chapter took so long! I'd love to hear what you thought and, as always, have a wonderful day/night.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0004"><h2>4. Chapter 4</h2></a>
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    <p>Sunlight flitters into the bedroom, golden and bright. Logan blinks against it as wakes, wondering how long it has been day, and how long the day might last. They’ve got to get out of here soon, he thinks. They won’t stay too much longer, Roman won’t allow them to stay too much longer. Logan’s sure of it. But it’s… it’s been <em>nice</em>, being here. Not much to worry about, no real responsibilities, nothing that makes him want to tear his hair out from stress.</p><p>It helps that Logan is still currently enfolded in Roman’s tight embrace. If you’d have asked him mere days ago if he was someone who enjoyed cuddling, he would’ve replied with a stern no. Of course not! He’s logic, reason, thinking things through thoroughly and clearly. What place could embracing possibly have in logic?</p><p>Well, as it turns out, Logan sort of… <em>likes</em> cuddling? A lot. Quite a lot, actually, and it’s really becoming embarrassing the longer he thinks about it. But Roman’s embrace is so warm and nice, and Logan had no idea how pleasant such a thing could be until now.</p><p>Roman’s still asleep, and Logan finds comfort in the steady beat of the princely side’s heart in his ear, his lead lying on the other man’s chest. Roman’s so peaceful like this, the worry lines smoothed out and tension nonexistent. He seldom looks this way, and foolishly, Logan wishes for a moment that he could take a photograph. Christ, when did he become so damn sentimental?</p><p>Roman stirs sleepily, a hand landing in Logan’s tangled locks. Roman strokes his hair for a moment, not yet fully conscious, and Logan leans into the touch. No matter how things go when they return to the mindscape, no matter how mundane their lives will likely once again become when they return to their posts, this cannot be forgotten. Logan, for most of his existence, has avoided touch at all costs, dodging hugs from Patton, keeping to handshakes if he could help it; but now? Now, Logan’s face is buried in Roman’s pajama shirt, his arms wound around his middle, and Roman’s carding through his hair. Nothing about that is particularly forgettable.</p><p>“Mm… morning,” Roman mutters, voice still thick with sleep.</p><p>“Good morning,” Logan replies, exhaling as Roman begins massaging his scalp.</p><p>“This okay?” Roman asks, his voice just edging on caution. Logan hums, his eyes slipping closed again.</p><p>“Yes, ‘s nice,” Logan must be taking longer to wake up than he’d previously assumed because his words are barely coherent. Roman chuckles, the sound low and rumbly and sending shivers down Logan’s spine.</p><p>“You’re awfully cute like this, you know that?”</p><p>“I am <em>not </em>cute.”</p><p>“Oh, I beg to differ. Come on, calculator watch, it’s a compliment! It’s just that I’ve never seen you so…” Roman pauses, searching for the words, “Domestic, I suppose.”</p><p>“Yes, well. Don’t get used to it.” Logan can’t allow himself to say ‘please get used to it. Please, expect this of me, want this of me. Please.’</p><p>“Whatever you say,” Roman says, fondness dripping with every word. “Did you sleep okay? Was the bed alright? I tried to make them as soft as possible– but also firm. But, you know, one can never be too sure. And– and I wasn’t positive which you preferred; soft or firm, that is. And –.”</p><p>“It was fine, Roman,” Logan interjects, finding Roman’s hand and squeezing it tight, a gesture he can hardly explain the reasoning of. He sits up, and Roman sits up with him, their fingers still intertwined, and, oh dear, why does Logan’s face feel so flushed? “It’s a very nice bed. Quite, uh, quite comfortable. There’s nothing to worry about.”</p><p>Panic swells in Logan’s mind. He knows that Roman can’t possibly be proud of all of his creations, especially if his recent behavior has anything to say about it, which it does. But to spiral out so much over something as simple as a mattress? That’s… well, that <em>can’t</em> be good. Not at all.</p><p>“Right,” Roman says quietly, sighing, “Right. Of course, there’s nothing to worry about. And– I wasn’t! Worried, that is. I just wanted to make sure you were comfortable, but I wasn’t worried.”</p><p>“Roman.”</p><p>“Yes?”</p><p>“Are we…” Logan pauses, exhaling sharply before meeting Roman’s expectant gaze, “Are we going to talk about it?”</p><p>“Talk about what?” Roman asks, feigning ignorance because of course, he is. It’s not as though Logan didn’t expect this. Nevertheless, it rather frustrating to have to deal with.</p><p>“About last night.”</p><p>“What’s there to talk about?”</p><p>“Roman…”</p><p>“I’m hungry. Are you hungry?” Roman asks, letting go of Logan’s hand and maneuvering off of the bed. “Why don’t we go rustle up some breakfast, hm?”</p><p>“<em>Roman</em>.” Logan tries to ignore the loss of contact and how empty it makes him feel.</p><p>“I’m positively starving! I’m thinking bacon. Sausages, too. How do you take your eggs? Over easy, right?”</p><p>“Over easy, yes. I’ve always preferred them to scramble,” Logan says, the promise of food distracting him, though only for a moment, “Wait. Roman, please. Surely there’s much to discuss. We can have breakfast afterward, can we not?”</p><p>Roman stands, his eyes trained on the wall, trained anywhere that isn’t Logan.</p><p>“But I’m hungry <em>now</em>.”</p><p>Logan lets out a shaky breath, biting back the retort that’s bubbling in him and settling for a nod.</p><p>“Okay. Fine. We’ll eat first, then talk.” The relief that shines on Roman’s face when he turns around is devastating.</p><p>“Really?”</p><p>“Yes,” Logan says, snapping his fingers and changing from pajamas to his normal attire, his hair no longer a rat’s nest. He’s always been able to conjure things. They all can, but it feels so much<em> easier</em> here, in Roman’s domain. “Now, come on. I believe I was promised bacon.”</p><p>Roman blinks, albeit a little startled, before smiling, brightly and boldly. He snaps dramatically, red pajamas swapped for his princely garb.</p><p>“Right! Yes, of course!” Roman says, peppy as if he’s already had his morning coffee, “The finest you’ve ever tasted, I swear to it!”</p><p>Roman grabs Logan’s hand excitedly, and the logical side can’t help but let out a sound of surprise. He holds it tight, all the same, relishing in the comfort that it brings on.</p><p>The two walk through the winding halls and Logan can’t help but wonder how large this castle really is. It felt like he’d gone through room after room with no end before Roman had found him again, but now, walking alongside him it still feels almost as expansive and random. <em>Is</em> it random? He can’t be sure, and honestly, he doesn’t want to ask.</p><p>They make it to the kitchen after what must be at least ten minutes of walking; geez, this place is huge. They’ll make breakfast, they’ll eat, and then, they’ll talk. That’s what he said, what Roman <em>agreed </em>to. And so, that’s what Logan tells himself, over and over.</p><p>But it doesn’t stop doubt from creeping in, from some level of sense remaining. Roman will fight this as long as he’s able, avoid the conversation until Logan forces him to have it. And then, when Logan does so? What happens next? Will Roman tell him everything, how he’s feeling, what it meant to him when he kissed him on the forehead and called him ‘love’ of all things? Because, good lord, it meant too much to Logan. Far more than he wants to let it.</p><p>And will Logan, in turn, admit to everything too? Will he admit to everything: how he’s felt so worthless and unappreciated by the others, how much he cares for Roman, how much he… he…</p><p>Oh.</p><p><em>Oh</em>.</p><p>He hadn’t – that is to say, he hadn’t realized how intense it’s gotten. He didn’t know he could feel this strongly about anything or anyone. It doesn’t make sense; it’s so<em>, so</em> much to wrap his head around.</p><p>Logan’s in love with Roman.</p><p>Logan’s been feeling awful lately and isn’t thinking too highly of himself as of late, and – <em>fuck</em> – he loves Roman.</p><p>How can he possibly go and tell him a thing like that? How can he convey all the intense, unbearable, unexplainable things he feels for him in words? What could sum up the burning in his chest, growing stronger by the second? And what if Roman doesn’t feel the same? Love is such an illogical thing, and yes, Roman has seemed to reciprocate his feelings, at least to some extent. But does he <em>love </em>him? That would be so much to expect of him; too much, probably.</p><p>Roman’s going through so much, it… it might be rude, to unearth such intense information. And what if he makes a fool of himself? Logan’s never understood his feelings much at all, and now he has to face the fact that he’s in love. It isn’t… it isn’t <em>fair</em>! Their coming here was supposed to be relaxing. A vacation, of sorts, not this damned revelation!</p><p>“-gan? Logan? <em>Logan</em> – hey, specs, are you alright?”</p><p>Logan snaps back to reality, Roman hovering over him and looking terribly worried. Apparently, Logan sat down in one of the chairs in this massive, beautiful kitchen. Or… or maybe he collapsed into it? Or Roman helped him to a seated position? He doesn’t know. But he <em>does</em> know that Roman’s hand is on his shoulder and his eyes are wide and full of worry. Logan’s heart is beating wildly.</p><p>“I-I’m…” Logan struggles, the words caught in his throat.</p><p>"Logan, what's the matter? You must tell me what's troubling you; I want to offer aid. What's wrong, love? Please, tell me."</p><p>Love. Love, love, <em>love</em>. Why is Roman calling him this now? Can't he see how it sets his heart ablaze?!</p><p>“I’m– I’m alright. I’m fine. Just got a little… lost in my thoughts. But I’m okay now.” Logan’s voice feels horse and ill-fitting, and Roman’s not buying it, there’s no way.</p><p>“Are… are you certain? You just kind of <em>flopped</em> into that chair. You didn’t hear when I called you the first few times. Are you sure you’re okay?”</p><p>Of course, he’s not okay! But he can’t explain that to Roman. So, he grits his teeth and nods.</p><p>“Certainly. I am fine. Now, why don’t we start on breakfast? I’m beginning to get rather hungry.”</p><p>“Al-alright! Well, if you’re sure. Yeah, let’s make food. Want to help?”</p><p>“Sure,” Logan says, standing on slightly trembling legs, which he prays Roman doesn’t notice (He does).</p><p>Logan’s perfectly okay with Roman continuing to change the subject. If Roman never, ever, admits to the truth, then fine. So be it. Logan can make peace with that because… because he doesn’t think he can make peace with these feelings of his own.</p><p>Roman knows that he’s lying, he <em>has</em> to, but Logan’s caught Roman in quite enough lies for things to be just about equal.</p><p>=+=</p><p>“We’ve looked everywhere! There’s– there’s nowhere they can be! Pat, what are we going to do?!”<br/><br/>Virgil’s trying, really, he is. But the panic creeps in anyhow, and he can’t stop it. Because it’s been <em>two</em> days and Logan and Roman are nowhere to be found. Thomas isn’t completely incompetent, meaning they have to be <em>somewhere</em>. They didn’t just vanish. But he’s been struggling to come up with video ideas, and he’s been making stupid logistical errors, ones he wouldn’t be making if Roman and Logan were here doing their jobs.</p><p>Patton’s panicking too. He’s trying to cover it up, and put on a brave face, but Virgil sees through it. It would be hard not to.</p><p>“Well, kiddo… we haven’t checked <em>everywhere</em>.” Patton looks apprehensive – why does he look apprehensive?</p><p>“What-what do you mean – wait? No,<em> no</em>, there’s got to be another option.”</p><p>“But they might know something we don’t. Listen, I know that you don’t want to talk to them. I understand that. But Remus and Janus might be able to help.” The desperation in Patton’s voice is palpable.</p><p>“It’s… it’s <em>weird</em>. Hearing his actual name. I haven’t heard it in a long time. I can’t believe he told you guys.”</p><p>“Virgil…”</p><p>“And Remus? You really think he’ll help us, even if he knows something?” Patton sighs, pinching the bridge of his nose.</p><p>“Well, we’ve got to try, right? I’m really getting worried here, and I know you are too.” Virgil bites his lip.</p><p>“I mean, yeah…”</p><p>“It’s a miracle Thomas hasn’t called on either of them yet,” Patton says, voice dipping into a whisper, “I don’t want to worry him.”</p><p>Panic crosses over Virgil’s face, or at least <em>more </em>panic than was already present.</p><p>“Shouldn’t – shouldn’t we tell him though?” Patton shakes his head.</p><p>“Let’s talk to Jan and Remus first. And then… then I guess we’ll see.”</p><p>“Jan?” Patton doesn’t miss that look in Virgil’s eyes, and oh dear, he said that aloud, didn’t he?</p><p>“<em>Janus</em>. I– I meant Janus. I, well, I –.”</p><p>“It’s okay, Pat. Just– caught me off-guard for a sec,” Virgil cuts him off, treading as carefully as he can, “You guys are getting close, huh?”</p><p>“I…”</p><p>“I said it’s alright, popstar. I mean it. Just because I have baggage with them doesn’t mean you have to.”</p><p>Patton looks away.<br/><br/>“You know I do too.”</p><p>“Yeah, but it’s different. And that’s… well, that’s okay. I know things are different now. I just gotta get used to it, I guess.”</p><p>“Would you prefer if I talked to them alone? I don’t want to make you uncomfortable.” Virgil shakes his head.</p><p>“No. No, I’ll come. I’m not scared of Remus anymore. There’s nothing to be afraid of; I just <em>really </em>don’t want to do it.”</p><p>“And Janus?”</p><p>“Huh?”</p><p>“Are you scared of him?” Patton asks, his voice achingly soft. Virgil takes a shaky breath, his fists clenching and unclenching as he starts off in the direction of Remus’s room.</p><p>“Come on, let’s go.”</p><p>Wordlessly, Patton follows, more than a little worried by that response.</p><p>=+=</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Fluff, yearning, angst, and self-doubt. A fun combination, don't you think? I hope you enjoyed this chapter, and I'll see you in the next one. have a wonderful day/night!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0005"><h2>5. Chapter 5</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>It would be a lie to say Patton isn’t absolutely terrified. Of course, he was worried the moment Logan and Roman were nowhere to be found. Of course, he was panicked when he and Virgil went looking for them, only to realize nothing was turning up. It’s as though they scattered on the wind, gone without a trace.</p><p>But Virgil was just so <em>scared</em>. Patton voicing his concerns was only going to make things worse, and things had been off between them as it was. Besides, he wasn’t very good at hiding his worries, anyhow. It was hard to imagine that Virgil hadn’t picked up on it, so there was no reason to actually say it aloud.</p><p>They should’ve gone to see Janus and Remus sooner. He <em>knows </em>they should’ve. It’s just… Janus, Remus, and Virgil aren’t exactly three peas in a pod. Patton’s been nervous to ask Janus exactly what went on between him and Virgil. And Virgil hasn’t responded well to the question, so he’s backed off. No reason to rock the boat.</p><p>And Remus. Well, it would be a lie to say Patton’s 100% comfortable around him. That isn’t to say that things haven’t been better; he’s Janus’s best friend, so Patton’s played as nice as he can. Certainly nicer than Remus has. But approaching both of them with Virgil, who’s already so against working with them is not ideal, to say the least.</p><p>But what choice have they got?</p><p>Virgil knocks hard and insistent on Janus’s door. After a few moments, it swings open, the look on Janus’s face hard and cold when he catches sight of Virgil.</p><p>“Virgil,” he regards, voice stiff, “To what do I owe the pleasure?”</p><p>“Where are Roman and Logan?” Virgil asks like it’s an accusation. Maybe it is, Patton realizes. The thought certainly never once crossed his mind, but it seems Virgil’s stuck on it.</p><p>“I beg your pardon?”</p><p>“They’ve gone missing,” Patton interjects quickly, not intent on an altercation of some kind breaking out. Janus’s expression softens the moment he sees Patton over Virgil’s shoulders and, goodness, this really isn’t the time for Patton’s heart to flutter, now is it?</p><p>“Hello, Patton,” he says smoothly, and yeah, Patton’s heart is skipping a beat, the situation be damned. How can he not when Janus looks at him like <em>that</em>, all soft and kind? “Would you two like to come in? Remus and I were just finishing up a game of chess.”</p><p>“Remus plays chess?” Patton asks. Janus shakes his head, stepping aside and allowing the two entrance.</p><p>“No. But he does like to eat the pieces.”</p><p>“<em>You</em>,” Virgil says pointedly, eyes narrowing at Remus sitting on Janus’s bed, a chess piece between his teeth. “Where the hell is your brother? Where’s Logan?”</p><p>Remus spits the piece out on the duvet, half-eaten, and smiles, demented and wide.</p><p>“Are they missing or something?”</p><p>“Seriously; where the fuck are they?” Virgil asks, not backing down.</p><p>“I haven’t killed him if that’s what you’re suggesting. Not for a lack of trying, mind you. But I haven’t hurt a head on his prissy little head, nor the resident nerd with a stick-up-his-ass. I haven’t seen them at all for a few days.”</p><p>“And you didn’t think that was kind of odd?”</p><p>Remus shrugs, collapsing onto the bed like a heap of boneless flesh.</p><p>“I’m not exactly making an effort to spend time with him, in case you haven’t noticed. And nerdy wolverine’s okay but <em>way</em> too uptight. I wasn’t worried about it, though. Been pretty quiet around here lately; the perfect time for chaos, isn’t it?”</p><p>“You say you can’t find them?” Janus interjects, directing the question at Patton. The fatherly figment nods nervously, eyes darting between Virgil and Janus.</p><p>“Yes. At first, I figured maybe they just needed a little space since, well… you know.”</p><p>Janus does. It’s not as though he’s unaware of the tensions that has hung thick between, him and Roman, and the tension Logan’s clearly been dealing with. And that isn’t even beginning to cover Virgil.</p><p>“Anyway, we’ve been looking, and looking, but–.”</p><p>“We can’t find them,” Virgil interrupts, clearly not in the mood for any nonsense, “Do you two have any idea where they might be?” Remus lets out a laugh, long and loud, as though the prospect of Logan and Roman being missing is just <em>too</em> funny. “Hey, what’s your problem, man?”</p><p>“Remus,” Janus says, casting a wary gaze at his friend, “I’m not sure now is the time for laughter.”</p><p>“Of course, now is the time for laughter! This is fucking hilarious! You mean to tell me that Roman, the golden boy, Thomas’s <em>hero</em>, has up and left! And– and not just that: Logan’s gone with him! Logic has literally left the building!”</p><p>“Remus, this is <em>serious</em>,” Patton chastises, his voice booming in a far more serious tone than usual. The change in tone seems to startle those in the room, even Remus, to a degree.</p><p>“Yeah, maybe. But it’s still funny as shit.”</p><p>“And you don’t have any idea where they are?” Virgil asks Remus with narrowed eyes.</p><p>“I give you my word. Haven’t seen 'em.”<br/><br/>“How much is your word worth, exactly?”<br/><br/>“Not much.”</p><p>“UGH!”</p><p>“Kid- <em>Virgil</em>,” Patton says, remembering that fateful conversation, remembering how Virgil doesn’t want to be called such things, and remembering how <em>much</em> he’s already slipped up, “It’s gonna be okay. We’re going to find them. Just because Remus doesn’t know where they are doesn’t mean things are hopeless.”</p><p>“How long have they been missing?” Janus asks. Virgil turns to him, a fire in his eyes.</p><p>“Two. Days.” The expression that spreads over Janus’s face betrays deepening worry. It seems the severity of things is beginning to click.</p><p>“My god.”</p><p>“How did you two not notice something was up? Thomas has been acting all… well, he doesn’t have his creativity or his logic! He kind of fucking needs those things.”</p><p>“Hey, I’m still here!” Remus points out, as though he’s ever been granted much creative control. The comment goes ignored.</p><p>“In all fairness, Remus and I have not played nearly as major or a role in Thomas’s role as you all have,” Janus says, “I hadn’t noticed anything too out of the ordinary, and there had been no need for any lying to take place in the last few days. I do wish you’d come to us sooner.”</p><p>“That’s a no-good excuse and you know it,” Virgil snarls, “It doesn’t take a genius to see that something’s up.”</p><p>“You think I’ve been paying much attention to Thomas for most of my existence? Not like he was paying attention to me,” Remus says, getting up from where he’d flopped over on the bed, trying to hide the resentment in his voice. It’s there all the same, blistering and heated, and Patton wants to say something. He feels like he should like Remus is clearly going through something, and he has experience with bottling things up, and Remus isn’t the type to do a thing like that, and –</p><p>There isn’t time for that right now, is there? Later, maybe. But not now. Janus is resting a hand on Remus’s shoulder, the look in the deceitful side’s eyes so unbearably soft that Patton feels, for a fraction of a second, a pang of jealousy. It’s stupid and unfounded, of course. He’s comforting his friend, for Christ’s sake, something Patton had wanted to do just a moment ago. Besides, despite how kind the expression on his face is, it does little to compare to the way he’s been looking at Patton lately. And, oh gosh, he can’t help but get distracted by the thought. He needs to stay focused.</p><p>Remus bats Janus’s hand away, looking dejected and furious, though not towards him.</p><p>“Remus, Janus,” Janus perks up at the mention of his name, “<em>Please</em>. We just need to stay calm and put our heads together. Do you have any idea where Logan and Roman might be?”</p><p>Remus’s sullen expression quickly morphs to one of glee. Suddenly, all eyes are on The Duke.</p><p>“What the hell? Why’re you smiling like that?!” Virgil asks, anger quickly brimming.</p><p>“You don’t have any idea where they could be in the Mindspace? Nowhere at all?”</p><p>“Remus, you said you didn’t know where they were,” Janus says, concern inching into his voice, “You haven’t mentioned anything. Do you know something that we don’t?”</p><p>“Come on. I know Logan’s not here but use those brains! I don’t know <em>exactly </em>where they might be, but if you can’t find them anyplace, where is there left to look?”</p><p>A pause lingers between the four for a moment before Patton speaks, voice quiet and awed.</p><p>“The– the Imagination?”</p><p>Remus claps obnoxiously loudly.</p><p>“Very good, Pattycake! <em>Very </em>good!”</p><p>“Wait… you think. You think Logan and Roman are hiding in The Imagination?” Virgil asks anger and suspicion giving way to fear.</p><p>“Well, where else could they be? Thomma-lama-ding-dong isn’t completely without his logic and creativity, is he?”<br/><br/>“Well no…”</p><p>“So we know they haven’t croaked! But if their influence has been lessened, and you’ve searched absolutely everywhere else, then there’s your answer. They're in Roman’s side of The Imagination.”</p><p>“Why would they be hiding? Why would they spend so much time there?”<br/><br/>“Beats me. But by the sounds of that conversation you all recently had, I don’t imagine Ro’s ego is doing so hot. And Logan well, pshh, he’s always been a high-strung one, hasn’t he? He could really use a good lay.”</p><p>“Remus!” Patton gasps as if it’s of the more shocking things he’s heard Remus say.</p><p>“Come to think of it…” he says with a pause, snapping his fingers when the connection strikes, “That might be why he went with Roman, right? I mean they’re obviously desperate to get into each other’s pants. I mean, you could cut the sexual tension with a fucking knife!”</p><p>Virgil and Janus groan in unison, finally having found something they can agree on for once, not that they’re willing to acknowledge it; meanwhile, Patton is doing something far more concerning: considering Remus’s perspective.</p><p>“Come on man, that’s disgusting.”</p><p>“No he’s… he’s got a point.”</p><p>“<em>What</em>? Pat you- you can’t be serious,” Virgil sputters. Janus looks just as confused.</p><p>“Not- not about all the sex stuff!” Patton defends, hands in the air, and Remus sing-song the words “Whatever you sayyy~,” “But about Logan and Roman, uh, teaming-up, I guess. I mean, they’ve clearly been connecting more lately. They depend on each other. And…” Patton pauses, his features momentarily marred with sorrow before he shakes his head, “…and things have been a little <em>tense</em> lately. So… so they might’ve needed some time to cool off. And so they left.”</p><p>“You say they’ve been gone for two days now?” Janus asks and Patton nods solemnly. “Oh, dear. That can’t be good.”</p><p>“Yeah, no shit!” Virgil says, beginning to look a little worse-for-wear, his breathing becoming quick and erratic.</p><p>“Hey, hey, Virgil. It’s going to be <em>okay</em>,” Patton says, moving to reach for the anxious side’s hand, “Can you breathe with me? In for four, hold for seven, out for eight. Yeah, that’s good. Just like that. Keep breathing.”</p><p>It takes a few moments to calm Virgil down; all the while Janus and Remus talk quietly amongst themselves (remarkably quiet on Remus’s part).</p><p>“Are you okay?” Patton asks softly. Virgil nods, still a little peaked, but his breathing has evened out.</p><p>“Yeah. Thanks for that…”</p><p>“Of course.” He turns to Remus and Janus, seeing the look of hesitance on both of their faces. Oh dear, that can’t be good. “What were you two just chattering about?” Janus lets out a long sigh.</p><p>“Remus has come up with an idea for a next move, and I think he’s on the right track.” From the sound of hesitation in Janus’s voice, and the fact that <em>Remus</em> had come up with the idea wasn’t shaping up to be good.</p><p>“What is it…?”</p><p>“Someone needs to go in and find them.” Patton frowns, wringing his hands.</p><p>“Are you sure that’s such a good idea? What if they want to be left alone?” Janus exhales softly, striding up to Patton and grabbing his hand, squeezing it gently.</p><p>“I’m all for self-care and taking time for oneself. But this… Pat, honey, this is too far. Thomas can’t just be without Roman and Logan for as long as they please, especially seeing as they didn’t inform anyone of their plans beforehand. They need to be here.” Patton casts his gaze downwards, fear worming its way through him. He’s faintly aware of the fact that this is the first time Janus has called him ‘honey’ in front of Virgil, but he hardly has the energy to care. It was going to come up at some point, anyhow.</p><p>“But what if they’re angry with us? What if they don’t want to be found?”</p><p>“Then we’ll cross that bridge when we come to it. What’s important is that they're brought home.”</p><p>“But… we can’t all go, can we? We can’t all leave Thomas mostly unattended.”</p><p>“Exactly,” Remus pipes in, suddenly standing alarming close, “Which is why I’m going. I’ll drag em kicking and screaming if need be!” Patton can’t help but shudder at the image. “Oh, and Virgil’s coming too.”<br/><br/>“What???”<br/><br/>Virgil’s eyes widen as everyone looks in his direction.</p><p>“N-no way! I’m not wandering into The Imagination with Remus! It’s his realm! Doesn’t he have that covered?!”</p><p>“Heightened levels of anxiety without logic to balance things out could cause Thomas unneeded distress,” Janus explains mater-o-factly.</p><p>“You’re just saying that! But I assume Patton’s staying?”<br/><br/>“Thomas wouldn’t be very well-off with deceit alone, now would he?”</p><p>Virgil groans into his hands, glancing at Patton.</p><p>“Are you seriously on-board with this? Really?”</p><p>“Virgil…” Patton sighs. “Remus might very well need your help. I don’t know what kind of situation you two will be facing, and I’d offer to come too. Really, I don’t like the idea of you two going alone. But Jan’s right; we can’t all leave Thomas unattended.”</p><p>“Right you are, Patton. Besides, I might need another person to help me drag them out kicking and screaming!”</p><p>“We’re not– UGH! None of that is happening. Patton, can I talk to you for a second?” Virgil says, casting an anxious glare at Janus and Remus, “In private.”</p><p>“Sure thing.” The pair step out into the hall, shutting the door behind them.</p><p>“Patton this– this is fucking insane!”</p><p>“I know this is a lot to process… believe me, it’s not the first plan I’d go for. But Virgil, I don’t know what other options we have. I don’t want this any more than you do, but we need to do something.”</p><p>"And you really trust him? You trust Deceit and you to be the only ones in charge while we’re gone?” Patton nods despite the uneasy look in the anxious side’s eyes.</p><p>“I do. We haven’t always seen eye-to-eye, but I trust him with this.”</p><p>“And- and you’d tell me if anything bad happened between you two? Anything at all, even if you didn’t think it was that big of a deal?”</p><p>“Of course. Virgil, has Janus ever… has he…” He can’t even get the words out, but to his relief, Virgil shakes his head.</p><p>“He’s never done anything to hurt me. We just, we don’t get along, okay? I don’t like him; you <em>know</em> I don’t like him.”</p><p>“I do.”</p><p>“And I don’t like this plan, either. It’s stupid and uncertain, and…” Virgil sighs, “and the only plan we’ve got. So… fine, I guess if it’s the only thing we can do, yeah. Okay.”</p><p>“Oh, thank you, Virgil,” Patton says, throwing his arms around Virgil in a crushing embrace. The emo gasps before hugging back, feeling Patton begin to tremble. “Promise me you and Remus will be careful?”</p><p>“I don’t know about Remus, but I swear I’ll be careful. And,” Virgil exhales sharply, “I’ll keep an eye on him. No promises though.”</p><p>“That’s all I can ask,” Patton says, “And if there’s any trouble, you’ll leave to come and get us? We won’t leave Thomas unless it’s an emergency, but if it is an emergency, please, get help.”</p><p>“I promise.”</p><p>Patton releases Virgil from his death grip, fear still written all over his face. Both of their faces, really.</p><p>Within a bit more time for planning, Remus and Virgil leave Patton and Janus to their own devices, Virgil begrudgingly following Remus into The Imagination. The perils they are to face are unlike that Remus had ever encountered in Roman’s half of The Imagination. Despite all that they believe about this rescue mission, they may very well be in for far more than they bargained for.</p><p>=+=</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Good lord did this chapter fight be the whole way through! I'm sorry this took so long, but oh boy, we're finally getting into the plans for a retrieval mission! Let's see what happens next! Comments and kudos are really appreciated. Have a wonderful day/night!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0006"><h2>6. Chapter 6</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Here's a moceit chapter because I'm always soft for them.</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Once Remus and Virgil have left, Janus and Patton sit together in the common room, tension still hanging thick in the air.</p><p>“Patton…” Janus says, breaking the agonizing minutes of silence. Patton sits beside him on the couch, twisting the cardigan wrapped around his shoulders in his hands, “They’ll be okay.”</p><p>Patton can’t tell if he’s talking about Remus and Virgil or Logan and Roman. All of them, probably. He wants to believe it, he really, really does. But… it’s hard. He’d been trying to keep it together for Virgil’s sake, but Virgil’s not here right now. It’s just him and Janus, and it wouldn’t be the first time Janus had seen him break.</p><p>“I don’t know about that,” Patton says, voice strained, “I really don’t. Roman has been so upset lately and Logan… god, I don’t even <em>know</em> what Logan’s been going through. Isn’t that just awful? That I don’t know?”</p><p>A gloved hand settles over his own and Patton exhales sadly, feeling himself beginning to shake.</p><p>“You aren’t awful, Pat. I promise you aren’t. You’ve very, very good to all of us.”</p><p>That still doesn’t feel quite right, hearing Janus say, ‘all of us.’ Lord knows Janus wouldn’t have said that months ago before things had shifted so dramatically between them. He was so cruel to him for so long, and he’s making up for it now, he really is. But it’s hard to forget the way he acted, the way he believed with such conviction that he was doing the right thing, that he was leading Thomas down the right path.</p><p>“I didn’t say that <em>I </em>was awful,” Patton responds weakly, and Janus frowns.</p><p>“I know you didn’t, dear. But you were thinking it, weren’t you?”</p><p>"Maybe.”</p><p>“Well, you aren’t. You’re wonderful, and I know you’ve always tried to do right by the others. Roman knows that, too. As does Logan.”</p><p>“I’m not sure if that’s true anymore,” Patton mumbles, feeling tears beginning to well behind his glasses, “I’ve made s-so many mistakes, Jan. I’ve had to say sorry again, and again a-and I don’t think it makes up for it this time.”</p><p>“We’ve talked about this, Patton. You’re <em>allowed</em> to make mistakes. You’re allowed to grow. Do you feel bad for what you’ve done in the past?”</p><p>“Of course I do!”</p><p>“Do you plan on acting the same way?”</p><p>“N-no. No, I want to be better.”</p><p>Janus squeezes his hand.</p><p>“I know you do. You’re a <em>good </em>person, Pat. So is Thomas. Things will work out with everyone. Remus and Virgil will find them and bring them home. We’re going to be alright.”</p><p>Patton sniffles, feeling the last of his composure slipping from his grasp. It feels wrong, Janus telling him this now when Logan and Roman are gone, Remus and Virgil on a journey to find them. A journey he prays is short-lived, but who is he kidding? The way things are going, that kind of luck simply doesn’t exist.</p><p>“Are… are you lying?”</p><p>A look of hurt flashes across Janus’s face and Patton wishes he had it in himself to feel bad. Somewhere in the depth of his heart, he does. He’d never want to hurt Janus, not even unintentionally, but for the most part, he’s just so damn tired. Janus’s sweet, caressing words are pleasant, but how can they be anything close to the truth when this is the mess they’re in?</p><p>“What?”</p><p>“Do you really think <em>I’m </em>good? After everything that’s gone on, after all the hurt I’ve caused. H…how can I be good?” Patton asks, tears slipping down his cheeks. “Aren’t you just- just telling me what I want to hear?”</p><p>“Oh, Patton,” Janus says, his voice tinged with so much sorrow Patton can hardly bear it, “Come here.” He opens his arms, holding them out for Patton, who stares sniffling for a moment before burying his face in Janus’s chest, letting out a strangled sob.</p><p>“It’s alright, dearest. It’s all going to be okay; you’ll see. I’m here, I’m right here. It’s alright.” Janus mutters the words gently, pressing a kiss into Patton’s curls as he rubs slow circles into the moral side’s back. It takes Patton a moment to realize that the two arms around him have multiplied to six, encasing him in a warm, snake-like grip that Patton can’t help but sink further into. He’s not supposed to take such comfort in this right now, he doesn’t <em>deserve</em> it, but… it’s nice.</p><p>Janus holds him there for a long while, whispering words Patton wants to be true. Three hands rub his back, two more massaging his scalp, the last holding tight to one of his hands. Even in the depths of his turmoil, with so much doubt clouding his mind, Patton cannot doubt that Janus loves him.</p><p>“My darling morality,” Janus says once Patton’s cries have ceased, for the most part, still holding him tight, “I don’t think you’re good; I <em>know</em> you’re good. One of the best people out there, as far as I’m concerned. You put such pressure on yourself to always know what to do, and what to say. But the fact of the matter is this: you aren’t perfect. None of us are, and it would be unfair to expect perfection.”</p><p>“I’m– I’m sorry,” Patton rasps out, his face still buried in the deceitful side’s chest.</p><p>“You have nothing to apologize to me for,” Patton makes a noise of protest, “That you haven’t already apologized for. I’ve forgiven you for what’s happened in the past between us, and you’ve forgiven me for the hurt I’ve caused you. That… well, that isn’t something that I’d been expecting of you if I’m being entirely honest. And I<em> am</em>. Being honest, that is.</p><p>Please believe me when I tell you that I know it’s going to be alright. Everyone will be okay, and then I suppose we’ll have a lot to talk about. I owe Roman an apology– he owes to one too, to be perfectly clear. But… I touched a nerve, and I said something I shouldn’t of.”</p><p>“He made fun of your name,” Patton mutters, “I – I can’t imagine how much that must’ve hurt, Janus.”</p><p>Janus likes the way Patton says his name; he’s fairly certain he’ll never grow tired of hearing it. Patton says it as though it’s holy like he’s never heard anything so beautiful. Janus is fairly certain his lover will never understand how much that means to him.</p><p>“Yes, well, we all make mistakes. Roman included. As for Logan, I’ve got an apology to deliver to him too, don’t I? I can’t imagine he enjoyed being impersonated more than once, regardless of how important I find my reasoning to be.”</p><p>“Do you think they’re safe?” Patton asks, his voice small.</p><p>“Who, dearest?”</p><p>“Roman and Logan. Do you think they’re alright?”</p><p>“They’re together,” Janus says simply, hoping it’s enough. Patton’s hoping too. “I’m positive Roman won’t let any harm come to him.”</p><p>“And Roman? Do you think that he- that he won’t let harm come to himself?” Patton asks hoarsely, pulling away so that their eyes meet. The hesitation in Janus’s eyes is enough to send another shock of fear through him.</p><p>“I suspect Logan will look after him just as much as Roman does for him. Regardless, Virgil and Remus are on their way now. They’ll find them, Patton. He might not always act it, but Remus cares about Roman, and he’s not letting him go. And Virgil… he has first-hand experience with ducking out. He knows how unwise that is.” Patton shudders, going back to clinging to Janus just as he had been a moment ago. As affectionate of a person as Patton is, this is new territory even for him. He’s not used to relying on someone this heavily, he isn’t used to feeling so <em>helpless</em>.</p><p>But… it isn’t Janus who makes him feel helpless. Even in this moment of weakness and fear, Janus holding him and talking so softly, there’s a little weight lifted off his shoulders. For the first time in a long time, it doesn’t feel like he has to have all the answers. He doesn’t have to put on a brave face; Janus doesn’t expect that of him.</p><p>“Do… do you think that’s what they’re doing? Ducking out?” Patton speaks the question so quietly, it’s almost inaudible as if the thought is so painful it can hardly be spoken aloud. Janus sighs, embracing Patton, doing everything in his power to take a little of the hurt away.</p><p>“I don’t know. I certainly hope not but… we won’t let them. We’ll remind them how important they are. How much they’re needed. Okay?”</p><p>Patton exhales tiredly.</p><p>“Okay, Jan.”<br/><br/>“Do you believe that I’m telling the truth?”</p><p>Patton pauses, worrying his bottom lip.</p><p>“I– I <em>want </em>to. It’s not that I don’t trust you! Y-you know that I do, that I know you’re –.”</p><p>“Shh, it’s alright, dear. There’s no need to fuss. I know you trust me. Here, look at me,” Janus instructs. Patton peels himself from Janus slowly, looking into those entrancing, heterochromia eyes. Janus has only two arms now, and his gloves are gone.</p><p>“Believe that I’m telling the truth when I say that things are going to be okay. Believe me, when I say that I trust that Virgil, Remus, Roman, and Logan will be fine,” Janus cups Patton’s cheeks, looking into Patton’s eyes with nothing but fondness, “And, please, believe me when I tell you that I love you. So, so much, dearest.”</p><p>“I love you too,” Patton breaths out, a hint of a smile forming on his lips as Janus leans in and kisses him. Patton’s hands settle on Janus’s waist as Janus pours every ounce of conviction into the embrace. Each press of their lips is a reminder ‘<em>I love you. It’ll be alright. You’ll be okay. I love you. </em>I love you.’ He cups Patton’s face as though he’s something precious, something to be treasured. That’s how Janus sees him, and Patton wonders if he’ll ever see himself quite the same way.</p><p>“Thank you,” Patton says as they pull apart, though he doesn’t go far, Janus’s breath still a warm puff against his face, “For making me feel a little better. And… and for loving me.”</p><p>“You don’t need to thank me for that, Patton. I would do it regardless.”</p><p>And wow, that melts Patton’s heart a little, thinking about how far the two of them have come. From advisories, on either end of belief to partners who love one another so fiercely, so understandingly, that Janus claims he would be there for him regardless. This love of theirs isn’t new, not really. It’s festered for years uncertainly just below the surface. Even when they were ‘enemies,’ and Patton did everything in his power to keep Thomas on the path of ‘good’, they never truly hated each other. It isn’t new, but it grows a little more every day. Patton will always, always be grateful for that. Grateful for him.</p><p>Patton can’t entirely believe all that Janus has said. But he <em>wants</em> to, and for now, that’s enough. And maybe someday he’ll be able to accept it all, to see himself for his strengths as well as his flaws. But for now, he clings tight to Janus, letting to words of reassurance wash over him gently.  For now, Patton hopes, and prays, and loves. At the moment, it’s all he’s got.</p><p>=+=</p><p> </p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Hey, so moceit fluff and Patton angst is fun, huh? I promise we'll get to logince and Virgil and Remus's rescue mission next chapter, but I needed some time with Patton and Janus. I'd love to hear what you thought of the chapter and, as always, have. wonderful day/night!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0007"><h2>7. Chapter 7</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Panic still thrums wildly in Logan even hours – or what he suspects to be hours; the sun has risen and set several times over now – after the initial conclusion. Not usually someone to give in to something so illogical, he prays that Roman can’t see the trembling of his limbs, or hear the nervous, fluttering thoughts his mind continues to produce. He’s freaking out and he doesn’t know what to do.</p><p>It’s not as though Logan wasn’t aware that it was a <em>possibility,</em> he could someday feel strongly about one of his fellow sides. He’s seen how Janus and Patton behave around each other, even when they think they're hiding their relationship well (they aren’t). He’s seen the passing looks that Virgil and Remus give each other from time to time, expressions that bear a strange mix of resentment, anger, and longing. Logan has long since given up trying to understand what those glances really mean. These are things that Logan’s always been semi-aware of, but he never expected them to apply to himself, especially not something as drastic as love.</p><p>It doesn’t make any sense. Sure, he was aware of a certain fondness he felt for the creative side. He was even bold enough to label it an attraction, but love? Something so achingly raw, so disastrous and strong? He doesn’t <em>understand</em> how he can be capable of such an intense feeling and it’s quite possibly going to be the death of him (figuratively, of course, although he can’t be too sure. This certainly <em>feels </em>like it could be a cause of death).</p><p>The point is, Logan’s trying to ignore it. After breakfast, Roman insists that they should venture outside of the castle and that he has something he’d like to show him. Logan doesn’t like this idea. While The Imagination is undoubtedly beautiful and fantastical, it’s also something he has so little understanding of. It’s far beyond Logan’s realm of comprehension, so odd and he barely knows what to make of it.</p><p>He would’ve never agreed to come here, was it not for Roman coming too. Even if he didn’t fully understand the reasoning then, he does now. It’s frightening, how far he’d go if Roman only asked. The lengths he would go to make that man smile are an issue he does not wish to dwell on, but he can’t help but do so. He remembers when it was easy to be stern to him, to say no. But now, in the state, they’re in? Logan is helpless, and Roman doesn’t seem to be much better off.</p><p>“Come on, it’s just up ahead,” Roman says, taking Logan by the hand. They’re going uphill, towards whatever destination Roman’s decided on. Logan tries to ignore the way his body tingles from their joining hands all the way to his shoulder.</p><p>“Where are you leading me?” Logan asks teeth gritted. He can’t help it; he’s so goddamn jittery.</p><p>“It’s a <em>surprise</em>,” Roman sing-songs, “Oh, don’t give me that look. It’s a <em>good </em>surprise, I promise.”</p><p>“I don’t particularly like surprises.”</p><p>“You’ll like this one,” Roman says so surely, as though he knows it without a shadow of a doubt. That’s odd, considering how unsure of almost everything he’s seemed recently. Roman has been so unhappy with his creations as of late, so dissatisfied, that the fact that he’s actually excited to show Logan something is… interesting. It’s <em>good</em>, probably. Logan thinks it’s good.</p><p>Upon internally battling this love he’s apparently been harboring and trying to quell the anticipation of whatever Roman’s surprise must be, Logan hardly notices that they’ve stopped walking until Roman gives his hand a gentle squeeze.</p><p>“We’re here.”</p><p>Logan looks out at the clearing that Roman has brought them to, his eyes scanning over the picturesque scenery. And then he spots them, and his heart flutters.</p><p>Two unicorns stand in the grass, looking at him and Roman. Their fur and manes are a pristine white, while their horns are a light bluish color. They don’t look startled by the sudden company, not in the least bit. In fact, they look curious, curious about <em>Logan</em>.</p><p>“Roman they’re– they’re beautiful,” Logan gasps, surprised by how taken aback he’s suddenly become. He doesn’t remember the last time he was so captivated – excluding, of course, every time he looks at Roman.</p><p>“Do you like them?” Roman asks, a smile gracing his lips that says he already knows the answer to the question.</p><p>“They’re magnificent,” Logan says softly, eyes fixed on the creatures. He tries to find it in himself to think this is ridiculous; Roman’s created these animals, there’s no such thing as unicorns. He’s logic, he shouldn’t be enamored by something so childish. And yet, he can’t help but be transfixed.</p><p>“You can pet them if you’d like.” The offer shouldn’t make him as happy as it does.</p><p>Logan turns to look at Roman, anticipation coursing through him.</p><p>“Are- are you certain? I don’t want to startle them…” Roman nods, smiling.</p><p>“Go on,” he encourages, gesturing to them. Slowly, Logan approaches one of them, a trembling hand reaching out.</p><p>“H-hello there,” Logan greets the creature, feeling a little silly. But then, the unicorn tilts its head and nuzzles against his hand. Logan melts.</p><p>“Oh. I think- I think they like me.”</p><p>“They <em>love </em>you,” Roman says, voice brimming with fondness. The other unicorn approaches and Logan’s smile widens even more so, his other arm outstretching to pet the animal’s mane.</p><p>Logan thinks not of the intensity of his feelings for Roman. He doesn’t dwell on the anxiety that has gripped his heart or wonder how long they’ve really been here – because he <em>has </em>been beginning to wonder.</p><p>No, for now, Logan simply takes the beautiful moment in.</p><p>“Thank you for this, Roman,” Logan says, the unicorns still very interested in him, nuzzling him and standing close.</p><p>“Anything for you, love,” Roman says softly, and for once, Logan isn’t overwhelmed by the term of endearment. His mind is far too occupied.</p><p>=+=</p><p>Leaves crunch underfoot as they walk in uneasy silence – silence Virgil is sure will be broken any minute now. It’s only a matter of time.</p><p>"So, you think they’re fucking?” And, <em>there</em> it is.</p><p>“Can you not, for like, five seconds?” Virgil asks, exasperated.</p><p>They’ve been walking for a while now in Remus’s side of The Imagination, heading towards Roman. The castle that Remus is fairly sure they’re residing in isn’t in view yet, but Remus claims it should be soon.</p><p>“Can I not, what? Be insanely charming?” Remus asks, elbowing Virgil with more force than necessary. The anxious side groans. </p><p>“Charming, <em>right</em>.”</p><p>“Oh c’mon, Virgey, admit it. You’ve missed me.”</p><p>“Don’t be ridiculous.”</p><p>Even as he says it, Virgil isn’t entirely confident with his statement. Of course, for a great deal of their time together, he was afraid of Remus. When they were younger the intrusive side was even more unpredictable, and Virgil had been going through so much at the time as it was. But it’s been a long time now since Virgil’s genuinely been afraid of Remus and his feelings are… well, they’re complicated. More complicated than he wants to admit.</p><p>“So, how much further is Roman’s side?” Virgil asks, hoping to change the subject. By the look in Remus’s eyes, though, he’s not getting out of it that easy.</p><p>“Not far now,” Remus says, a tinge of disgust in his voice, “I hate his frou-frou side. It’s so full of flowers, and rainbows, and unicorns. <em>Bleh</em>!” Virgil looks around at the fire-singed trees and strange creatures that surround them in Remus’s side.</p><p>“And yours is that much better?” He asks, gesturing to the decay. Remus smiles.</p><p>“Oh come <em>on</em>, Emo. I know you prefer this to Roman’s non-stop goody-two-shoes-ness. Admit it: he can be a bit much, can’t he?” Virgil bites his lip.</p><p>“Yeah, he can. But so can you,” Virgil says, “And, he’s never tried to set me on fire.”</p><p>Remus smacks him on the arm.</p><p>“That was an accident and you know it!”</p><p>“Mm, do I, though?” </p><p>Virgil isn't sure what's come over him. When they were with Janus and Patton, he'd been nothing but surely to Remus. A bitter attitude was pretty much all he allowed himself to offer him these days, but right now, he can't help himself from dipping into old habits of familiarity. It makes his stomach churn if he thinks about it too hard. He struggles to stop thinking about Patton and Janus.</p><p>“Do you think Patton’s doing okay?” It feels stupid, asking Remus. The Duke and Patton have by no means been on the best of terms, and regardless, Remus knows as much as he does. But he can’t help from worrying, and he’s the only person around to ask.</p><p>“Oh no, I’m sure Janus is torturing him horribly as we speak,” Remus says, his tone teasing but Virgil really isn’t in the mood, “What do you think his preferred means of torture are? I’d go for waterboarding, or bone-breaking, myself. But Double-D’s a more clean-cut guy, so maybe he’ll go for blinding. Not something messy, I’m sure. But I –.”</p><p>“Knock it off!” Virgil interrupts, anger rising with each word out of his mouth. Remus stops in the middle of the path they’re walking on, forcing Virgil to do the same.</p><p>“You’re not worried about Thomas’s safety, are you? That’s not why you’re asking if Patton’s okay?” Remus doesn’t give him time to butt in, “No, you’re worried about <em>Janus</em>. You’re worried about him and Patton being in charge together.”</p><p>“And what if I am?”</p><p>Remus glares at him, exasperated.</p><p>“You’d think after all those years you spent with us, you’d have a little more trust.”</p><p>“What reason has Janus given me to trust him in– god, ages?” Virgil spits venomously, “Think of how often he lied to me, to both of us!”</p><p>“Yeah, he’s <em>deceit</em>. It’s kind of in the job description.”</p><p>Virgil shakes his head.</p><p>“Not the way he acted.”</p><p>“So, what, you don’t trust him with Patton? Gee, Virgil, I thought that you were upset about him being overprotective of you. Looks like you’re turning the table on Pat.”</p><p>“I am not being overprotective!” Virgil says, but the waver in his voice indicates otherwise, “It’s just– he didn’t know Janus like we did back then. When we were the outcasts.”</p><p>“Oh, open your fucking eyes!” – Multiple sets of eyes suddenly appear around them, littering the sky and trees, before quickly disappearing – “We’re <em>still</em> the outcast. You and Jan have just gotten an upgrade. We’re still the ‘dark sides’, the ones that Thomas is most wary of. That’s never going to completely change, and you know it.”</p><p>“Remus, stop it.”</p><p>“Stop, what? Telling the truth? I thought you were sick of all the lying?”</p><p>“I said, stop it!” Virgil shouts, voice rising in volume.</p><p>“He loves Patton. He’s not going to do anything to hurt him, or Thomas, or anyone. The fact that you’re more concerned about Janus’s behavior than mine is ridiculous. <em>I’m </em>supposed to be the one who isn’t to be trusted.”</p><p>The prospect of Janus loving Patton, <em>really </em>loving him, and Patton feeling the same is one that Virgil does not know how to compute. Even still, despite his better judgment, he can’t help but dwell on the hurt in Remus’s voice. Why does he sound so wounded, as though he fully expects Virgil to still be terrified of him? And why does Virgil care in the first place?</p><p>“I– I never said I trusted you,” Virgil sputters, knowing it’s going to make things worse, but finding himself too overwhelmed not to dig himself in a deeper hole, “It’s just…”</p><p>“It’s just, what?” Remus asks, exasperation replacing his usual jovial tone, “Admit it: You don’t even know what you’re afraid of anymore. You don’t know what to expect of Janus because, newsflash, it’s been years since you’ve had a real conversation with him.”</p><p>“You don’t know what you’re talking about. This isn’t about me.”</p><p>“Oh, it isn’t, is it?” Remus asks with a laugh, though the sound lacks humor, “You know… Double-D’s never stopped missing you.”</p><p>Virgil stifles a cough as the breath is knocked from his lungs. Tightness settles in his chest, constricting and terrible, and he begins walking again, picking up his previous pace.</p><p>“Where are you going? I’m not done talking to you!”</p><p>“We need to find your brother,” he says without looking back at Remus, walking even faster, “We don’t have time for this.”</p><p>“I don’t care!” Remus says, and Virgil isn’t sure which sentence he’s replying to, “We need to talk about this, Virgil. It’s gone on too fucking long.”</p><p>“We don’t need to talk about anything!”</p><p>“Yes, we do! Do you know how hurt that Janus was when you left us? Do you know how long he mourned you like you’d <em>died</em>?”</p><p>“Shut up! Just– just fucking shut up!” Virgil cries, nearly running now, from what, he can’t say. The pressure in his chest increases, the sound of Remus’s footfalls not far behind him sending ripples of panic through him.</p><p>“You left us, Virgil! You left us without so much as an explanation! He missed you for years; still misses you! And so do I!”</p><p><em>That</em> sets a pit in Virgil’s stomach like so few things. He can feel the tension crackling in the air, can taste the regret forming on his tongue. Still, he continues forward, desperate not to look back and see the expression on Remus’s face, whatever it might be.</p><p>“You don’t know what you’re talking about.”</p><p>“Yes, I do!” Remus insists, his hand clamping down on Virgil’s shoulder as they breach the gap to Roman’s side of The Imagination.</p><p>And then, Remus and Virgil are plunged into darkness, as though the sun itself has been extinguished.</p><p>=+=</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Uh oh, looks like someone shut out the lights. That can't be good! </p><p>I'm sorry this chapter took so long, I really struggled with it. I'd love to hear what you thought, and as always, have a wonderful day/night!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0008"><h2>8. Chapter 8</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>*Emerges from the grave* I'm not dead! Hey guys, I know it's been forever and I really didn't know if this story was ever going to continue but I'm back with intentions of continuing till the end. I can't promise when each chapter is going to come out or the regularity because I've fallen out of the Sanders Sides fandom to a degree, but I have missed this story and I'm really excited to continue it.</p><p>In case anyone needs a quick recap, this begins just after the events of "Putting Other First", in which Roman and Logan are both very burnt out and Roman asks Logan to come with him into The Imagination for 'just a little while.' While in the castle that Roman has built, they spend many intimate moments while simultaneously avoiding their feeling for each other and their self-worth issues. </p><p>In their absence, Virgil and Patton grow concerned about them and ask Janus and Remus if they've seen them. In the end, after a tense conversation, Patton and Janus stay behind to keep an eye on Thomas while Virgil and Remus venture into The Imagination to try and retrieve them.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p> </p><p>“Do you think Remus and Virgil have found them yet?”</p><p>Patton sits on the sofa, Janus draped over his lap with a book in his hand. He sets the book aside, his attention set on the fatherly figment, Patton’s face drawn in deep worry.</p><p>“I don’t know,” he answers, before adding, “But I’m sure they’re alright. Roman and Logan are bound to stick together. And I can’t see Virgil leaving Remus’s side.”</p><p>It’s become more and more difficult lying to Patton. Janus finds it almost humorous; he’s <em>Deceit</em>, for Christ’s sake. He should be able to lie to Patton with ease, as there are certainly times in which it’s definitely necessary. Considering their troubled past, and Patton’s previous outright hatred towards all things fibbing, it’s laughable that Janus struggles as much as he does these days.</p><p>But he reminds himself, they’re partners now. It was one thing lying to Patton when they were ‘enemies’, and another entirely when they grew closer. But now? Janus has a hard time choking down a mere fib, and this is one of those instances.</p><p>He isn’t sure that they’re alright, not at all. He certainly <em>hopes</em> so. He’s put faith in Remus and Virgil to put aside their differences and find them. He doesn’t doubt that they’ll be successful, but the cost of such an outcome weighs heavily on his mind. Roman may very well not want to be found. And when it comes to Logan, Janus just can’t be sure.</p><p>Regardless, at most, this is a white lie. Small and, as of now, fairly harmless. He wants to reassure Patton that everything will work out fine and wants even more so to reassure himself of this. Patton’s been on the cliff’s edge of despair of these last few days, Janus is doing everything to stop him from slipping over. But… there’s only so far, a person can go, only so far you can try to comfort those you love, and he knows this. It would be foolish to believe he could irradicate every one of Patton’s doubts. Still, he can’t help but wish for it.</p><p>“You’re probably right,” Patton responds after a moment. He’s lying too. Janus can taste the bitterness falsehood in his mouth, and the look in Patton’s eyes gives it all away.</p><p>He presses a kiss to Patton’s cheek, curling up in his embrace, his book, for the time being, all but forgotten.</p><p><em>Hurry Remus</em>, he prays silently, <em>Please, keep an eye on him, Virgil. Bring them home.</em></p><p> </p><p>=+=</p><p> </p><p><br/>“Roman? R-Roman, what’s going on?” Logan asks urgently, swiveling his head around the now pitch-black field. The moment darkness enveloped the land, the unicorns scattered, whinnying as they ran deep into the thicket of the forest.</p><p>“I– its. It’s so dark.”</p><p>“Yes, I can see that.” Logan says, “<em>Why</em> is it dark? Where did the daylight go?”</p><p>Roman goes very quiet and though it’s difficult to do so in the dark, Logan can just barely make out the look of horror that’s spread across his face.</p><p>“Roman. Roman, what’s happening?”</p><p>“We need to leave,” he says after another moment of stunned silence.</p><p>“What?”</p><p>“We can’t be here,” Roman insists, grabbing for Logan’s hand and holding tight, “We need to go. Back to the castle.”</p><p>“Why? I don’t understand what’s going on,” Logan says, surprised to find Roman physically pulling him in the direction of the castle, “Roman– <em>wait</em>. What is the meaning of this? What's frightening you?”</p><p>“I– I don’t know. Logan, I <em>don’t know</em>, I- I don’t know what’s happening. But I know we need to get out of here. Something’s very wrong.”</p><p>Desperate for answers though he is, Logan, cannot ignore the way Roman’s voice wavers with utter terror.</p><p>“Will doing so help? Will it help you to understand what’s happening?”<br/><br/>“I’m– Logan it’s<em> dark</em>. It’s s-so dark. I don’t like it.”</p><p>“Okay,” Logan says finally, conjuring a flashlight. He expects that Roman would’ve done so sooner, were it not for his frazzled state of mind, “We’ll go somewhere light. Come on.”</p><p>Roman grips his hand almost painfully as they hurry back to the castle. The lights all flick on in unison as they make it through the doors. Roman let’s go of his hand, sagging against the wall, his chest heaving.</p><p>“Hey, hey,” Logan says uneasily, watching as his friend struggles, “It’s alright. We’re back where it’s light, you’re going to be alright.”</p><p>Not long ago, Logan’s sure he’d insist that there’s no need to be afraid of something as harmless as the <em>dark</em>. People’s minds simply wander towards the worst-case scenarios when they’re in pitch-blackness. Furthermore, he’s certain that Roman in almost any circumstance would be appalled to have revealed the depth of this fear. Regardless, though, they’re here now and Logan will not point out any of those factors.</p><p>If he thinks about it for a moment, there may be a good reason to be afraid of <em>this</em> particular darkness. Roman hadn’t seemed to understand its causation the least bit a few minutes ago and he significantly doubts that’s changed much.</p><p>“Something’s not right. It’s wrong, Lo. Lo, it’s <em>wrong</em>,” Roman pants, his breath catching in his throat. “It’s dark and– and something doesn’t feel right. It – it feels like there’s someone…”</p><p>“Someone who, what? Roman, I don’t understand what you’re telling me.”</p><p>Roman’s eyes widen, the expression of terror on his face worsening.</p><p>“Someone’s here.”</p><p>The moment the whisper exits his lips, Roman’s body goes slack. He pitches backward, his back hitting the wall hard with a <em>smack,</em> and try though he does, Logan isn’t quick enough to try and stop him from sliding to the floor. Hastily, he kneels in front of Roman, searching him over as thoroughly as he can.</p><p>“Roman, are you injured? Did something happen?”</p><p>He racks his brain, trying to think about a moment in which Roman was out of his sight long enough to have harm done to him. But they’ve been together since they woke up and Logan can’t fathom how Roman might’ve found himself in some kind of parrel. He’s clearly in deep distress, and Logan’s trying to figure out why that might be as quickly as he can. Roman offers no answer.</p><p>“Are you ill?” He ventures thinking that might be somewhat more plausible, “Do you feel unwell?”</p><p>Roman shakes his head fiercely. He’s shaking like a leaf.</p><p>"No,” he bites out as the word hurts him. Logan’s trying to help him up but it’s as though Roman’s body has gone numb, the shivers that rack him only growing worse as each second passes. “No, it’s not– I’m not sick. Can’t you see; there is something amiss. They’re here, a-and, and they don’t want us to be here. They want to <em>take us</em>.”</p><p>Logan is not convinced Roman is well. Not with that wild, unfathomable save for terror look in his blown-out pupils and the shivers that refuse to leave him.</p><p>He thinks he should do something.  what it is exactly is escaping him, but Roman is panicking and there must be<em> some </em>solution here.</p><p>Roman buries his head between his knees, clutching them tightly and making himself as small as possible. Logan’s heart hasn’t stopped hammering since the sun seemed to decide it would shine no longer.</p><p>“Roman. Please, you mustn’t be feeling well. Do you have, a fever, perhaps?” Carefully, Logan reaches to touch Roman’s forehead, only for the princely side to jerk away, suddenly standing on unsteady feet.</p><p>“I said, I’m not sick! It has to be a monster! A terrible, deadly beast! That’s the only explanation as to why I feel so… so…”</p><p>“So?”</p><p>“Afraid,” he mutters, “I’m afraid, Logan. You– you can’t let them take me, Logan! Or you! They can’t take us. They can't.”</p><p>For a moment, Logan’s mind turns to fellow sides. Roman couldn’t be referring to them with such dread… right? No, surely not. He and Roman aren’t exactly on the best of terms with them at the moment, but the state of their relationship would never warrant that worrying look in Roman’s eyes.</p><p>Unsure of himself, Logan says, “I won’t let anything happen to you, Roman. You’re safe here. I’ll keep you safe.”</p><p>He doesn’t have a clue what he might be keeping Roman safe from. Looking out the window, it’s hard to assess incoming danger in the sudden absence of the sun. but this Roman’s realm, a place he’s always been most in his element. As far as he’s aware, Roman’s felt content in this place and he doesn’t know why that would ever change.</p><p>Before he knows what’s happening, Roman is in his lap with his toned arms winding around his waist. He buries his face in Logan’s neck, shaking as the logical side holds him close. It’s strange, how familiar embracing Roman has become and, in turn, being embraced by him. Logan had never intended to become so accustomed to physical intimacy but now that he has, he hardly thinks it possible to stop.</p><p>If cradling him and promising protection might keep these unknown demons at bay, Logan will do so. When Roman’s head is clearer, he’ll try to get some information out of him. Surely there must be some way to understand what’s become of the sun – or the moon for that matter, for she too has vanished.</p><p> </p><p>=+=</p><p> </p><p>“What the fuck is going on?” Is the first thing Virgil asks when the lights go out. Remus <em>must </em>know, he thinks; he’s a part of Thomas’s creativity, for crying out loud! But when Virgil turns to him, his face now illuminated by the torch that’s he’s conjured, Remus looks as confused as he does.</p><p>“I don’t know,” Remus says, holding the torch of green fire in front of him, staring out into the otherwise inky blackness, “What did he do?”</p><p>“What did who do? What’re you talking about?”</p><p>“Roman,” Remus answers, “What the hell did my brother do? The timing in this place has always been weird but the suns never <em>disappeared</em> before.”</p><p>From his limited knowledge of The Imagination, Virgil can attest to that. He’s been here countless times with Roman, and a few with Remus, back in the day, and nothing like this has ever happened. He’d noticed the sun rising and setting at a hard to pin down rate, but this is just plain freaky.</p><p>“Do… do you think Roman knows what’s going on either?”</p><p>“He might, but–.” He pauses, a grave look settling over his face. “Virgil.”</p><p>“Yeah?”</p><p>“Does something feel wrong here?”</p><p>“Okay, you already know I’m anxious all the time, so I don’t know what you’re– <em>oh</em>. Huh. Are those…?”</p><p>“Eyes?”</p><p><br/>“Uh-huh,” Virgil says, noticing what must be dozens of pairs of glowing emerald green eyes in the bushes and shrubbery around them. “Are they you’re doing?”</p><p>“Not this time, Storm Cloud.”</p><p>Virgil spares a second to dwell on the use of a nickname he hasn’t heard from Remus in what must be years now before realizing, far more troublingly, that Remus looks <em>unnerved</em>. He isn’t the type to be afraid of things in The Imagination or just period, yet his eyes are wide as he takes in the sights and sounds that seem to be closing in on them.</p><p>“Stuff like this isn’t usually anywhere near Roman’s side, right?”</p><p>“Nope. He’s got unicorns and fairies and shit. You think these are unicorns and fairies?”</p><p>Considering the sinister look in those many sets of eyes and the growls and snarls erupting from the greenery, Virgil’s inclined to say, Nah, not wholesome fairytale creatures.</p><p>Virgil had gone into this situation knowing all was far from well, but this exceeds those expectations by a lot. He’d thought maybe a standoff between Logan and Roman would be evident, but he’d never worried that The Imagination itself might be hostile.</p><p>“Remus, what’re we supposed to do?”</p><p>“We’re gonna find Logan and my shit-head brother is what we’re gonna do,” Remus says, suddenly brandishing his morning star.</p><p>“But what about–.”</p><p>“What, this? C’mon, we can handle this. Just stick close.”</p><p>And as much as Virgil wants to head in the opposite direction, what choice has he got? They can’t return back to the mindscape emptyhanded and what if these creatures are, like, trapping Logan and Roman here or something? He seriously doubts that train of thought, but there’s no going back, not when they’ve already made it to Roman’s side of The Imagination. They’re here to do something, and goddamn it, they’re gonna do it.</p><p>It doesn’t stop Virgil’s heart from racing as Remus slips a hand into his, giving him a squeeze. Whether or not Remus is trying to comfort him or himself, Virgil doesn’t have a clue, but either way, he’s not letting go. Not right now.</p><p>One step at a time, hand-in-hand, they walk into the lion’s den.</p><p>=+=</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>I hope you enjoyed this chapter! I'd love to hear what you thought, it means the world to me to get comments from you guys. I'll see you in the next update and, as always, have a wonderful day/night!</p>
        </blockquote><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>This was done as a request on my Tumblr, exhaustedfander, but it ran a little long so I'm making it a multi-chaptered project. I'd love to hear what you thought of this first bit and, as always, have a wonderful day/night!</p></blockquote></div></div>
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